I don’t know how else to put it. I’m either so depressed I can’t function or I’m constantly agitated or anxious. I can’t work because I am either not functioning or hating every minute I’m confronted with other human beings. I hate that I’m like this. I just want to stop living a lie. Everything I do is a lie. I hate this life and I’m tired of acting like it’s just my depression that has me hating it. Like I have a chance of surviving into old age. I wish my husband would leave like he threatens to so I could leave permanently.
3 comments
It sounds to me like your husband is part of your problem with the depression then anxiety. I am sure you are not perfect yourself, but if he makes you unhappy you should leave him, not the other way around.
I appreciate it is easier said than done, very difficult when you are suffering emotionally. See your doctor, explain your plans, he may be able to set up some sort of support to help you make the right choices.
Who doesn’t suck at life? Don’t let appearances deceive you. Some people appear to be in control but it is just that; appearances. You can try to find ways to improve your life little by little. The fact that your husband is still there is probably because he cares about you.
Maybe, You two could work together a make things work.
We can be an Idol of light or a beacon of hope but in the shadows we’re on our scrapped knees screaming and fighting to make that image of ours real.