I’ve been feeling so depressed for the last year, and I feel like it’s stupid to, to.. i don’t feel like I have the right to feel like this. I feel like i have the wrong reason to feel/ be depressed. I’m transgender, and bisexual, but also, i was raped for almost three years, but I feel like thats not a good enough to be depressed, I know loads of ppl have it so much worse than me, that i feel like an poser… But yet I have self harmed, for a half year, but rn im clean for but a week, Sometimes I feel like laughing at myself bc i know that i have it somewhat easier than everyone else who is depressed..but i can barely smile, or laugh, or joke around. I can barely eat, sleep, or even think.. I’ve even thought about killing myself.. overdosing that it. but now.. im not sure what the hell my life is.. i feel like I could do better if im gone.. but i don’t know. i feel ugly, worthless, stupid, and a poser… I feel UNIMPORTANT…
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Your problems are important and you are important. What are your plans now?
I have no idea what my plans are going to be, but I feel like im not gonna be around soon
TransAlex101, being honest you have a lot to deal with in today’s society, i have enough just being straight, i don’t know if this makes sense or not, i am an atheist nobody really knows that, and i don’t have to tell the world, i don’t need to be accepted for it, around people i just be myself, if the occasion comes up i will take about it, my religious beliefs don’t need to be on stage, especially at work, i say don’t put yourself on stage, and when the time is right go on it, sorry if i’m rambling, try not to create drama, or put yourself in the position to get hurt, nobody other than a truthful few like on here can identify how you feel, they are few and far between, putting yourself out there causes the inter drama, you have enough to deal with just surviving, wanting acceptance is just to much in this world.
talk! ha ha! i’m fucked up!! 🙂
Hi TransAlex101
Everyone and each of us are unimportant. Those who seem important have worked to seem important by themselves or were promoted by a combination of circunstances. But in fact the important are also unimportant. We are not relevant to the planet or to the universe. We are a big nothing.
To feel important you have to discover some skill you have and cultivate that skill to achieve some goal. Helping yourself you can feel competent and relevant and by the time you will be important to yourself later yo your friends and so on.
About the other problems, be reserved all the time you need to recover and put your pieces together. There is no rush to interact to the world. Do the things on your own pace. Do the interaction to the level you feel confortable. By the time cool people will show up. Till there cultivate your garden and take care of yourself.
Suffering sexual abuse for almost three years is more than enough reason to be depressed. People have killed themselves over far less. You aren’t a “poser” in the slightest, Alex.
Thank you very much whiskeres-fish
No problem. I also wish you the best with your gender identity. That’s tough stuff to deal with. Hopefully, you’ll find a way to surround yourself with gentle and supportive people.
You’re not unimportant. We’re all here for a reason. I know that probably sounds like bullshit, (I thought it was bullshit too, for a while) but it’s absolutely true.