Me and my friend (who also suffers from severe depression) have started talking about making a suicide pact with eatchother. This isn’t his first time having one as the first time he made one with another person, they bailed last minute and criticized him for encouraging them to do it in the first place. Now that I’m currently at my all time low I’m thinking that having someone to do it with would be less scary since the first time I tried to kill myself it ended up being a traumatizing failure. I feel guilty in a sense that instead trying to keep my friend from killing himself, I’m now joining in on it.
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I personally don’t believe they are wrong, but they can certainly be very risky. My concern would be that the other person might change their mind and report me or that one of us might survive and end up in legal trouble.
Yes, I think the site is also trying to cover its own a$$ by not allowing such talk here.
But then again, I don’t see how a site like this would end up in trouble at all. It’s the people who make the pact who potentially might.
MysteriousVisitor, having studied a bit of law, maybe you could enlighten us on whether or not the site could end up in trouble ? And if not, then, the site doesn’t really have a reason to prohibit it here, except if the site admin does not want to “promote” it, right ?
In fact, this site is quite tolerant of pro-suicide talk (esp. intentions) in general, compared to any other site I’ve ever been on. I’ve been kicked off of a few for pro-suicide talk.
I’m not an attorney and cannot give legal advice. I don’t know if the forum would be primarily governed by the laws where it is based or if it could get into trouble in other countries where the laws are different. The international nature of the internet is a whole other thing. I know that being covered by freedom of speech in the United States hasn’t prevented people from filing lawsuits. The law is flexible and open to interpretation, as it should be.
And yes, the trust issue is also very important as mv pointed out. How well do you know this other person ? The human ego, especially an emotionally supercharged one that has been driven to the point of suicide, is quite capable of becoming a backstabber.
Now about your personal situation, I would be very wary of anyone agreeing to make a pact for the very reasons that you yourself have brought up and are obviously aware of:
1 – They might bail on you
2 – If both of you bail, you may get criticized and have to deal with additional drama
3 – If you survive, you have survivor’s guilt
4 – If the other person survives, he/she can make up whatever story he/she wants about you. Lies could be spread about you.
You can see yourself getting tangled up in an emotional mess involving another person’s potential death. Worth it ?
For me, personally, suicide is NECESSARILY a private act. It is the most sacred action I will ever perform, and my last few days are going to be my most peaceful and special on this Earth. No one on this Earth gave me the time of day while I was alive, and I don’t give two shits about others anymore, esp. during the final transition. I lived alone and will die alone.
Suicide pacts wrong? Not really but then again nothing is wrong and nothing is right.
However I personally don’t understand a Suicide pact? when you die it’s just you anyways we all go out alone, even if someone is their holding your hand, your going on that trip by yourself.
I guess if you think you have company in your decision to die it makes it easier knowing your doing that right thing?
I would think It would be harder knowing I had an influence on someone else and helping them kill themselves by being a partner.
When i go it will be just my decision, and wish good luck to others.
Suicide pacts wrong? Not really but then again nothing is wrong and nothing is right.
However I personally don’t understand a Suicide pact? when you die it’s just you anyways we all go out alone, even if someone is their holding your hand, your going on that trip by yourself.
I guess if you think you have company in your decision to die it makes it easier knowing your doing that right thing?
I would think It would be harder knowing I had an influence on someone else and helping them kill themselves by being a pxxxxxx.
When i go it will be just my decision, and wish good luck to others.
Yes, pacts are unethical. They too often pervert consent. The concept of a pact can be used to manipulate someone into killing themselves when they have changed their mind.
Ha. This is sort of the argument for presidents to divest their business affairs, too.
The only ethical use of a pact would be something like this: Alice and Bob agree that they will kill themselves the next day at noon. Suicide helpers place each of them in a sealed box alone with a me+hod. There is no means to communicate with each other and no way to leave. The next day at noon plus one minute the suicide helpers open the boxes to find that the boxes were too well sealed and Alice and Bob asphyxiated.
I had a suicide pact once myself. It was going just fine. My partner had me making sure that things would go successfully. I did not want to let her (or me!) down so I worked hard on the coming event and really had no chance to be scared because I was so busy. Then came the day to do do the deed and she, well you guessed it. She not only changed her mind but got me to change mine too.
On super rare occasions a pact succeeds, but it really is a stretch to assume the other person is really as ready as you are. Now as to your question:
As long as you put no pressure on the other person to do the act, I see no wrong in having a pact. But I also bet you will be alive at the end of the day too.