for the sake of others

i can’t think

i can’t fucking get my brains to work like how i want them to work

i can’t think and it’s affecting the rest of my body

i am crumbling, shaking, breaking

my chest hurts because my heart tries its best to keep beating when i don’t want it to

my eyes feel heavy because i deny myself the sleep i really need

i’m tired

my limbs feel weary with every step i take

i try to drag myself towards a future people say i deserve,

but do i need that?

i don’t want a future at all

i just wish to go

and still i keep myself breathing

i keep myself alive and well

what do i live for?

am i keeping myself alive for the sake of others or for myself

do i want this?