I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m getting more and more introverted. I’ll spend all day every day alone in my bedroom and when I have to be around people I’ll feel panicky or feel like hiding away from everyone. A few days ago I went to an event that I was required to go to and everyone was talking to each other and I sat in a corner by myself for literally an hour and a half. I don’t look forward to social events and dread having to speak. I don’t do anything for most of the day-I lay in bed and listen to music-I can’t make myself do anything else but my family doesn’t know this. The only thing I look forward to is dance class. Cutting no longer gives me any relief. What’s happening to me? I don’t know if I can overcome this.
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I used to be very outgoing and extroverted, then I had some kind of nervous breakdown at age 19, and turned into what you are describing.
Ive been that way for 22 years now, except for the cutting…I took the substance abuse route instead.
It’s terrifying to witness this happening to yourself, I know.
Over those years, wondering “what the hell is wrong with me?” Ive come to believe some things about it.
Most simply put, my inner self is crossing a deep dark valley on it’s way to some kind of ground where I will be better able to see.
Right when the nervous breakdown happened, it came with this idea that it’s going to be a tough go but it will be worth it in the end. I never could shake that idea.
life sucks for sure, but hang in there .
there may be something good in the future and u should stick around to see it.
I feel the same. Lately I seem to be losing the little confidence that I have left. I’m very introverted, but I also recognize that being an introvert and desiring relationships is a thing. I don’t really have to go into many social situations right now because it’s summer , but my involvement during the school year will require me to and I absolutely dread the thought of it. I have pushed myself to attend things in the past but it’s always a waste of time because I feel invisible so I ask myself why I didn’t just stay in bed.
But I’ve been depressed for years and it just gets worse and worse. I used to have “walking” depression but this last year…I barely made it through school and now…I just don’t know if I can do this anymore. I’m so alone and so tired of everything.
Do you ever get moments where it seems to all make sense?
if i was at that event and i saw you, i’d have approached you and have most likely eased your tension. i’m drawn to those loner, withdrawn, reclusive types. most of society shuns them, but i understand it and i find it intriguing, honestly. just think… you made it to the event. that’s a success in itself, right? you didn’t coward out and stay home, so i commend you for even trying. cheers!
It’s better to be alone… at least you don’t have to hear the views and opinions of the righteous motherfuckers who are fucked in the head.