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When everything isn’t enough

by nozmoking

He had as he said “complete freedom”.
In his words, “Total creative license, and support to go anywhere and do anything I want at anytime.”
He had a daughter that loved him.
He had no checkbook to balance. Just numbers to call to get whatever he wanted or needed anytime of the day or night.
Sometimes the most difficult choice  of the day was deciding between a burger and a beer at a bowling alley in Pittsburgh and something endangered and flambe’d served on sterling silver at the White House.

Two days ago he hanged himself in his hotel room.

What do I see everywhere? People stupidly in response posting the suicide hotline number all over the place like they are saving the fucking world.

And here I sit without any rope in too much fucking pain and too weak to reach anything useful if I had one. With the immense privilege of sharing Tony’s depression. I best be grateful or Karma will fuck me.

 

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definitelyworried 6/10/2018 - 4:59 am

I was just reading a bit about him and thought to myself, maybe hanging isn’t that bad of a way to go.
If they could do it why can’t I do this.
I wonder if he did full suspension or partial suspension.

Perfect Day 6/10/2018 - 6:09 pm

You’re so right about the useless suicide prevention number, and this story really highlights it. Celebrity suicides are important to look at because they show that sometimes NOTHING helps. Money, love, fame, freedom, family, purpose, and all the pills in the periodic table can’t help someone who is running down this road full speed. Along the same lines, I barf in my soup whenever I see the headline “man saved from suicide”. Yeah some cop wrestles him to the ground and throws him in a psych ward. Saved. Life is peachy. Let’s have another suicide prevention walk where a bunch of clueless nitwits wear t-shirts and feel good about themselves. Meanwhile you and me and a few thousand others inch closer to the noose.

Mark_1981 6/10/2018 - 6:43 pm

Well put @perfect-day . “Life saved” or “Gets the help he needs”…. Just words that makes people feel good about themselves or feel like they’ve helped.

Such an incredible amount of people don’t have a clue.

I couldn’t have put it any better than you.

spectralgiraffe 6/10/2018 - 7:22 pm

Thats the thing though. They don’t really give a stuff. They only do this to make themselves ‘look’ better to others

mindlessgamer619 6/10/2018 - 9:50 pm

It’s important to realize that these celebrities, who are rich or famous or both, despite seeming to have it all, can still feel quite suicidal. It’s even worse for the vast majority of people who will never have that kind of reach or exposure. Being told to suck it up, deal with it, etc, as opposed to truly attempting to either understand and sympethize, or to realize that some people are so far gone that nothing you say will truly change their minds…

It’s just terrible that we’re in a place where people feel so shitty with their individual lives that suicide is the only option, despite their individual reasons, or supposed lack thereof.

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