I have had a terrible dream this morning. I dreamt of having the cloud of depression over me. I was living in a shady little place with my father in this dream. We had no privacy together and were boxed in. I dreamt I was completely hopeless and finished with 5 interviews already. While the dream went on, I was afraid none of the employers will phone me back. I had 78 dollars left in my bank account. I was sticking him for a burger meal and I was worried if that amount goes to zero, he would have to support me fully and I would be bust. I went back home and saw him going off to work. I felt hopeless. I also remembered how there was a rather large lady on a photo and we both laughed together at the “cheese” subheading of the post. I felt trapped, as if there was no escape. I also wanted to contribute financially and I felt so handicapped. I realised my father is getting older and won’t be able to support me longer. I realised that I am trapped.
Please help me a bit with your interpretations learning about my other posts. What do you guys think?
4 comments
Quite evident that your worrying over your career prospects is reflecting in your dreams. Your mind is overburdened with guilt of being a failure (purely in financial terms) and it manifests as dreams of your father suffering.
Your post hurt as hell because I’m kind of in the same situation. My aging parents paid for my college tuition after my savings ran out. Now job season is coming up, but I don’t have it in me to even face an interview, let alone land a job. I’d tried offing myself 7 years ago but they found out. Its been awkward since then, but I guess this is my last chance. Not getting a job this season will be my outro cue.
I wish you luck, man. I feel you’re not a hopeless case. Just hang in there, try more interviews and in time you’ll make your old man proud.
Thanks for replying Yoges. Unfortunately the programming of this site is extremely poor. I actually should have done this myself! I want to click on your username to see your posts but I am deviated. Tell me a bit more about yourself. What bought you here? How old are you? What did you study? What is your current situation? Let’s get some sort of conversation going instead of just leaving everything midway and moving on. I am sorry that you felt suicidal. Were you sent to a clinic? What bought you to that point?
I had a dream, i was reaching into womans saving box and taking their money. One box had a rather large wad along with some pills powdered up. I remember thinking they wouldnt know it was me who took the money. Then I was in a yard and dropped some of the powder on the grass and all the grass that was alive and green started decaying until it was all dead and rotting. Not the worst dream I’ve ever had. I don’t know where the money comes into play, but I do have pills powdered up in my drawer should I choose to commit by OD.
COD,s. I just replied to your other post in the other forum. Seem like you, me, and lifelong loser make up the dark triad of this forum now ;). I sense a real resistance and dissociative trait in your dream. The woman was definitely the projection of who you are; the side of your self that is caring. The savings you were seeing were lost memories. That is the memories of the youth you had and your past. Even though you think about suicide all the time, you realised in this dream how long and hard you worked for to shape an elixir of a future you thought you would had, but never reached. The “money” was everything that you cared about and now you feel guilty as all those things dont matter as much as you know it should. The yard is the representation and synergistic unconscious. It represent your lifestock and how much you have left. The last amount of life in the grass goes back to the expression “grass is greener at the other side”. Green is the colour of life. You need to change something COD. You aren’t ready for death yet. Try make a change in your life. Give it another shot. How is the job searching going?