Until you kill yourself no one really cares. You can tell your family, friends, lover how mentally tired you are. They can see the dull look in your eyes. They invite you places and pick up on the fact you’ve been hiding out in your room in your free time. You can tell them how hard school is and how stressed you are and how you wish you didn’t even go to college. They see your self harm scars from years ago that you managed to hide for so long. You try ranting to them about how emotionally unstable you’ve been and how stuck you are and how you don’t know what to do. You can make jokes about killing yourself all the time. You don’t talk highly about yourself in fact you’re really hard on yourself and they observe this. Some of them even ignore you when deep down you really needed someone in that moment because they’re not even thinking about how that’s effecting you. And if you’re really close with them some of your inner thoughts might have even slipped up in front of them. No one tries to talk to you. No one reaches out to make sure you’re okay even though, because the fact no one ever asks you, you’ve probably asked one of them if they’re okay themselves. You literally can be screaming I’M NOT OKAY with the words you say and your actions and your appearance but they don’t care. They don’t bother to ask or check in. They only care once you’ve plummeted so bad that you actually killed yourself.