Yesterday I told my crazy father that I ve had enough of his bullshit. I feel like he kinda damaged my self esteem when I was growing up, always putting me down and asserting his absolute dominance over me since I was a kid. He always had to embarrass me in front of people and tell me that Im worthless in private. I have had enough. I dont ever wanna see that guy anymore. He replied with a simple text message: “I should have left you die.” That only confirms my expectations. As I thought, my mom wanted to abort me and he talked her out of it coz he wanted to have more power over her and eventually me. Knowing this makes me hate him even more…
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Think about what you wrote..your user name is wrong, it should be “son of pathetic male” everything you said about him points to being a vile pathetic spiteful human being. He must have incredibly low self esteem to put you down or tell you you are worthless. Instead of listening to his bs, look at it as a sign you must be doing something right that he feels so threatened and intimdated by you and he needs to hurt you or keep you down. You are much better than him and he knows it, you know who you are and its not hat he says, so dont let the words hurt you.
Thank you for your words of encouragement. I rly appreciate it. Unfortunately being a son of a moron doesnt make me a good person, nor it doesnt deny me being pathetic. It is kinda my fault.
I know I should have just distanced myself from him a long time ago but I just cant. I m too weak. I always end up being guilty and sorry for him, Im the only one he has after all… I thinks that´s exactly how he plays it but I still cant help myself. So every single time I come back like his good obedient dog. That rekts my self esteem 100 times harder than any of his trashtalking.
aaaaand you can bet your ass that Im gonna do it again this time 🙁 I really must be lacking some sort of self value.
Study some Jordan Peterson material, dude. It sounds like it’s practically tailor-made for you.
Dude you dont even know how many hours I spent watching Jordan Peterson. I have red the book too. He is great and I totally see myself in many situations he describes and Im sure it helped me a bit. Still his words of motivation seem to pass right through me for some reason. I know Im making bad decisions in life but for some reason I cant help myself even if I see it presented as clearly as Jordan does it.