I have trouble letting myself be happy. I have everything going good for me right now. So what do I do? I try to ruin everything because I can’t bring myself to believe that I’m allowed to be happy and have good things. I’d rather wallow in pain than be happy
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I think that after a while, we become used to our own suffering. So much so that it becomes a sources of comfort. Sometimes, you enjoy the familiarity of the pain.
In some instances, a new sort of pain settles, and you bend your body in all directions for it to be accoustumed to this new kind of pain and unhappiness.