Social interactions gettin unbearable

I used to be pretty misanthropic. I mentioned it to my uncle, and he said that in his experience, you get what you expect. Something like that. Meaning if you approach other people with the expectation that they’ll be boring, annoying, unpleasant, whatever – you’ll probably bring out that side of them.

I’ve been in lots of therapy and meetings with social workers in my life, and recently I’ve noticed that many of them don’t really listen. Maybe that’s why I feel like I get tossed from one department to the next with no end in sight. I figure if just one of them had taken their time to actually listen to me, deeply, to draw out the things I held back out of shame or guilt or embarrassment, maybe I wouldn’t still be stuck.

I have had the experience of being listened to, of being paid attention to by a person, and it had a profoundly transformative effect on me. It was like sunlight and water are to a plant. Somebody saw me, somebody valued who I was, and I grew, and so did my confidence.

This was a long way of saying that maybe it’s your attitude you should try to change. Also, nothing personal, but in my limited experience, alcoholics can become really bitter and unpleasant over time.

I hope you find your way out of addiction, that you find some peace and calm in your mind, and feel able to let in others again.

Good luck