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Its finally happening

by fakingit

I started my account here in 2012 I have been through a whirlwind of adventure. From countless suicide attempts I discovered a reason to stay alive. I definitely do struggle, I got severe post partum depression but that actually changed my life. It kicked me in the ass to get a job and I learned being a stay at home mom wasnt my thing and that’s okay. My fiance has abusive tendencies but honestly I do too and were working on them together. I have been the sole provider for nearly a year now my fiance can’t hold a job and money is my biggest stressor. His mom moved out of state to arizona and our lease is ending next month and we have nothing but .14 in savings he lost his most recent job. Its beyond frustrating but hes better in other ways and I remind myself that. Things are finally taking a dramatic turn. Come october 14th were packing all our belongings aside from essentials into storage and leaving for Arizona we plan on staying with his mom til were on our feet. I am over the moon. My life is simultaneously falling apart and coming together at the same time. My parents are so toxic it’s best we get away anyways. They relentlessly talk bad about my fiance tell me I’m better off without him and that I should stay home with them forever. I’m finally getting away and hopefully staying away.

My reminder to keep pushing forward things change things get better. I wouldnt get to experience this and all the amazing things that have happened it my attempts worked years ago. Hang in there y’all


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darkwillow 9/4/2019 - 5:01 pm

Life is crazy. I wish I could send this to 14 year old Hannah and see what she thought of it.

fakingit 9/4/2019 - 10:53 pm

Long time no talk :p

Right? Wouldnt have believed it honestly. Miss you, feel free to catch up sometime.

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