I was in a very very dark place not too long ago. I felt worthless and like I had no purpose. But I recently went to a Catholic conference and I had an encounter. I met so many caring people, and I also experienced a loving God and I finally felt seen and known and loved. I found my purpose in life is just to spread love to people, and I don’t have to do anything to make my life worth living. I found healing and I haven’t gone back to that dark place since then. I found healing in God and there is a light at the end of the tunnel and an end to the suffering it truly does get better.
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I used to feel that way, now I’m just afraid of getting screwed over and my whole mindset is one of scarcity and distrust.
I used to feel that way too (although I only believed in “God” as an abstraction or a metaphor). I attended Unitarian Universalist services regularly, joined a national service organization, wanted to become a teacher. It was great for a couple years. Then, well, I guess I just got sick of being disrespected or taken for granted so often, and concluded that it wasn’t worth fighting my social anxiety all the time to reach out to people if that’s what was going to happen. I also have mild Asperger’s and struggle to connect emotionally, so maybe I was just doing a real sh*tty job of spreading love.