“Hey dudes I’m afraid I’ll hurt people if I leave”.
Really? Come on dude. You’d have to have pretty low emotional intelligence to honestly ask yourselves this question. Can we be honest here? Completely honest? How many of you actually think this? How many of you are just using this an excuse, a cover-up not to leave? Bargaining by saying these people will be “hurt” if you leave and they’ll miss you lmao. Or pretending that you care HAHA! What kind of reasoning is this? How do you have so much trouble with a simple matter of discretion?
I can’t imagine many of us have people in our lives who actually make a quantitative difference for this to matter. It’s part of how we got here. Does anybody really care about us? Of those who can actually say yes, are there enough people for it to matter? And/or of those people, does your death have a truly significant effect on their life or lives? Haha no, probably not. If you had rich fulfilling lives, you wouldn’t BE here. Right? And boo hoo. A bunch of NPC’s who couldn’t care less about your life now suddenly care about your death? Because it effects them NOT because they care about you -personally-. But just because, someone died, and therefore they are cognizant of the omnipresent tragedy of death in their community, at their doorstep, and haunting their every breath… Something like that, I’m sure. Why are people sad when people die? Death ain’t that bad. Not every death is a tragedy. Can you imagine? It’s what EXPECT to happen from the moment we are born. Everybody knows nobody lives forever. So why do we act shocked? I’m not going to get into philosophy my point is, I’m tired of seeing this stupid fucking question popping up on this site every damn week..
And imagine actually having that unhealthy a mindset. I OWE them something. Haha. What messy, twisted emotions must you have to… Just, forget about it. I’m just tired of feeling like I’m getting brain damage whenever people even humor this question.
8 comments
It’s interesting how people can see it this way.
speaking personally, I’ve mentioned suicide once two years ago to my mother’s face, and she straight up told me that she’ll kill herself right after my death, if i do it, so did my sister. For me, if non of these people cared about me, I would be dead by this moment.
but I don’t want to kill my family?
People’s minds work differently, as much as I would like to pretend that my world would end, after the end of my consciousness, I can’t. I understand how you feel because during episodes I’ve had similar thoughts. May I ask why you’re staying?
I’m not.
what do you mean?
I would question why it bothers you that people consider this. Some of us are lucky enough to have people in our lives who care about us, in my case who have put themselves through a lot trying to help. I owe them more than I can repay. I can’t blame my misery on a lack of care or family dysfunction. I fucked this up all by myself.
Now it may be that I’m just using that fact as an excuse, to cover up my own selfish reasons for wanting to live. But it’s still a fact. I feel like I care, sometimes. Thinking about their reactions to my death certainly doesn’t feel ok. But regardless of my motivations, I’m pretty sure of the effect it would have on them. How unfulfilling or pathetic my life is has no impact on that. For some people, family is family.
My mindset is certainly unhealthy, and my emotions are definitely messy and twisted. That’s part of why I’m here.
I have a husband and daughter who rely on me to provide for our family. I’m pretty sure they care about me and my parents too, that’s what keeps me here, I can’t leave them with no way to survive, I would be gone by now if I didn’t feel obligated to care for them.
It doesn’t make it selfish to commit IMO but it will hurt them, and that is not my goal. People are here for all different reasons, mental illness doesn’t care much about your life circumstances.
I def dont think i owe any1 anything. But with every method ive done, a normal person would of died. I seriously cant go out by my own hand apparently. Not even a 2months supply of insulin killed me off(im not diabetic, my dad is) So im just accepting the fact that i have too much unfinished business that my body simply cant just let go. Plus me and my kids are homeless right now. It would suck if i didnt atleast get them off the streets 1st. My 1 kid is autistic, and he has no survival skills and im all they have in the world.
Ya I’m autistic myself I know what it’s like having very low survival skills. Maybe you can file a disability claim for your kid and use that money to get on your feet
I’m sorry, your situation has compelled me. Have you received your stimulus checks?
You’re very lucky when it comes to this particular situation, you’re a woman with two children and one is disabled. So you shouldn’t have problems getting back on your feet again if you consult the proper resources.
Sooo, basically the tentative plan is, you should be able to get your stimulus money if you haven’t yet by filing a tax return and filing for a recovery rebate credit, which will result (best case scenario, which is what we’re aiming for) in the 5,400, in your case due to dependents (supposedly) arriving at your mailing address within a couple weeks or less if you do it right.
Homeless people, and people without income, as it appears can both file tax returns. The first step is obtaining a Form 4852 by calling the IRS and informing them of your situation. I believe you should be able to get one by informing them that you can’t get your W-2 or 1099 since you don’t have an employer. It would of course be better if you actually had these on hand but I digress, I am just using Google for all of this… If they try to stand in your way for some odd reason the first thing I’d do is try to talk to a different representative or at worst find a pro-bono lawyer specializing in these types of situations.
Phew, anyway, the 4852 is just something that will be required to actually file your taxes and get the money. Getting it to the mailing address is just a matter of filling out your taxes ONLINE and signing up for a direct deposit when you file because both of these things are much faster and doing all that stuff by paper will take up to 6 to 8 weeks, it says.
Anyway I’m not assuming you’re stupid or necessarily don’t know anything about taxes so I’m gonna digress on this for now unless you actually mention that it would be useful to get into it.
This is a government site that finds your nearest housing authority… It looks like you’ll have to find the nearest one that has affiliated with the CoC (I’m not sure if they all are?) so you can apply for the Continuum of Care program and try to find transitional housing… I could help you through that, too.
https://www.hud.gov/program_offices/public_indian_housing/pha/contacts
This is a link which will show you the nearest housing authority. You will have to contact them and ask about applying for the CoC program, and they should take it from there.
Of course the reason you’ll have a chance at success is because you’re a single mother with two children, one of which is disabled so you’ll be considered a priority. From that point on, you should try to apply for SSI benefits for your child with autism and ofc get employed and all that jazz.
The stimulus check will be the most important part if you can’t find a transitional residence without having to pay rent. So ideally 5,400 split month to month would be maybe two to three hundred rent plus food all the while trying to get a job etc.
I don’t know if any of this was useful to you, maybe you’ve tried any or all of these things. But if you want we can keep talking. Also you gotta make it look like you sook out this information of your own initiative, you can’t just say you got told it by some stranger on the internet obviously lol but I can help you if you need.
Anyway I’ll be here, gotta go take a shit and maybe get some sleep.