I was trying to explain to a straight [non severely depressed] person how I feel today. Then I hit it;
the entire premise that most adults function on ; “Maybe someday it will get better.”
That’s just it though, if you fail that deception you end up depressed. The carrot on the stick is a better day later, and I’m at the point that the carrot has to be made of plastic, because that is how distant a better day is.
So, that’s it for me. It isn’t getting better. Everybody is dying the slow way, and all I want is to fast forward.
5 comments
There’s always a chance to meet someone new and travel. Something new to experience. Yeah that’s the carrot I’m chasing but I get it now and again despite all my problems.
Okay Bye.
Why do we insist that self denial is noble and to be pursued? Wallow in filth today (“Look Dennis, there’s some lovely filth here!”) because tomorrow will be brighter and better. Optimism is good stuff, but sometimes it’s just pig mucus mixed with pigeon poo. Tomorrow might be a better day, but it could also be the day you slide under a gas truck and taste your own blood. Yum.
I feel the fast forward part of this. I’ve always connected with people older than me, I’ve been told over and over my entire life that I’m mature for my age or that I have an old soul. I don’t know what that means exactly, I do, but at the same time, I don’t know what else someone would act like.
Anyways, off topic for a moment, a cherished song I’ve always loved says, “see the young man sitting in the old man’s bar, waiting for his turn to die” this has always felt so real to me, and your post reminded me of it. Just fast forward until it’s my turn please. The song is Broadway by The *** *** Dolls of you’re interested.
Religion seems to be a big carrot on the stick for most people