So basically what the head title says.
I am not suicidal right now. I am around 40 years old, life alone and have a personality disorder. I am not depressive or have any other illnesses.
I plan to life until the day one of my parents passes away. I plan to take care of one of them when they get old. So they don’t end up in a retirement home.
My biggest problem is, because of that mentioned personality disorder I don’t plan on having a family, kids or a partner. So I will definitely end up alone when I am old. Which really scares me, because I don’t want to end up in a retirement home all alone. In the country I life there are already way to less people who want to do this job and there is a lot of abuse against elder people, who can’t take care of themselves anymore.
I think about this extremely often. The idea of suicide scares me, the idea of rotting away does scare me even more.
Anybody else who feels this way?
I think I would do the dehydration/no drinking anynore method. It’s rough, but definitely guarantees death . I hope I will be at an age then, where my body already is weaker than now. So it will be easier.
Thanks for reading, if anybody did.
5 comments
this is one of my problems as well and im only in my 20s but have enough health problems and pain that its joked about me being 80.
even just making it to 30 is a concern for me.
may i ask about a medical assistance in dying option? i know where i am if you have a physical or mental (now) reason you can get it, but ive always questioned about just generally aging.
Yeah this is one of my major concerns just in case I don’t kick my bucket while still young. Here’s my vague plan – either I’ll hang around after my parents passed as long as I can stay independent and then end it by starving in some remote scenic wilderness, or I’ll take to the woods the very next week the last of parent’s funeral and hunger strike into oblivion. Nature wipes out the mess, no one else bothered; clean job all in all.
They keep pestering me nowadays, asking about my plans for marriage and family. But I can’t tell them the above-mentioned plan. Can’t tell them the real reason is to avoid collateral damage. Tired of beating around the bush for appearance’s sake.
Kind of relate. I expect things to fall apart before then, but if I live long enough to become infirm, I hope I find the conviction to end it before I end up in care.
I think I have the same fear, bit different response; I plan on being active right up until the end. I’m 33, and decline has already begun. I am lucky though that I have spent enough of my life caring for others who can’t to know where the line is. I know what is necessary to be independent. The main things are; eating, sleeping, bathing. If you can keep those up, you can stay independent.
The other thing is that I keep hobbies that force my body to stay functional, and I’m so dependent on them that I refuse to drop function. The big one is gardening, if I reach a point that I stop gardening I’ll probably be dead.
I think you are right though about that point, where there’s nothing left to stay alive for; people who get to that point tend to die, one way or another. I think anyone over 75 that is still alive has something they are sticking around for.
Yes you always hear of horror stories of the elderly being abused by staff in nursing homes. So I’d never want to end up there nor put my older parents there. My father is fine and he remarried, has a new family that’ll take care of him.
My mother is ok for now-no major health issues and is independent. However she’s a Christian and wouldn’t consider euthanasia because of her dumb beliefs. She’s the main reason I’ve stuck around and I won’t seriously consider suicide until she’s gone since no one else will be able to look after her, including herself.
My major issue is one of income but I think by next year I might be able to make a positive career move-I have my own project I’m working on that could fix that problem once and for all.
At this rate I probably won’t have kids either they’re a lot of work, unless I find a great partner and am more established in life.
Perhaps you live in a European country with euthanasia is legal, you really should look into that. Why suffer needlessly to end your life if there are easier options. Also there are ways to go which only take minutes with little suffering, rathering than starving yourself.