not that it feels like it has any part being here, beside people talking about chronic pain, poverty etc. That’s often the problem, my issues seem silly compared to the problems of others. I guess I’m trying to make peace with being silly…
So the grad program I’m going into did a webinar this evening, an hour of talking about the program and what it’s there for. I get why, well informed is better for them. At the same time, it feels like a sales pitch. I don’t know if I buy it, the whole “we’ll put you into a fulfilling career”…. yeah, heard it before, not taking it on face value now.
I guess I have to define myself, since they are doing such a shoddy job. I’m doing this for the interesting problems. That is something of value, I’m still nervous about potential debt, which has not been fully dealt with even though I’ve been at it for six months. The “promise”…. IDK, I’m getting some red flags. “we’re like family”…. yeah, I worked with some other people’s families, it can be abusive. Most of my employers have been abusive.
Supposedly there’s a shortage of people in this field…. which you’d think would push pay upwards, but looking at the pay data that’s not what I see happening here. Yes, it pays well. It doesn’t pay “critical shortage” well. At least not based on the numbers the program gave me.
I feel like an oddball too, some of the other people are talking about work/family/school, and I’m like let’s just see what school has going on. Maybe six months to a year in we can talk about outside work. I’d like to get healthy enough to have a family….. there’s no certain path to that.
So I repeat my central question; not whether I’m being deceived because simply by not telling me everything that’s true. Whether I’m being sold a bill of goods. Whether this university wants to take advantage of my ambition and drive, and if they can afford to pay for it. It’s going to cost a lot. Today I was talking with my wife about my hair, which currently hangs past my shoulders. I said I’d have to get a two year assured contract for at least $80k to cut my hair. That’s a pretty low hanging adjustment for a job, and I wonder what else might be asked of me.
Worse, if this is a bill of goods, I need to figure out a plan B, and I don’t have any prospects for that right now.
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How much is the debt? Most grad programs cost way more than the return. If you’re having doubts, I would seriously weigh the risks and benefits. Far too often ppl get their graduate degree and the pay is nowhere near even worth the debt they have to pay for decades after. But that is up to you. I would seriously look at the potential future salary and the future debt, how long is the debt, how much is the payment, etc. And what likelihood you would get a “satisfying” job from it.
This reminds me of my dumb ass who DIDN’T take advantage of the free grad school program back when my workplace they had it. I didn’t want to go to grad school for a boring 2 year degree in Finance, but hey, it would’ve been free. Now, ofc, it’s too late. *face palm* Also, they’ve cut the free grad school program. OFC.
What grad program/degree would this be?
$10k a semester, 5 semesters, so roughly $50k on the surface. $8k in scholarships so far, and still working on drumming up asssistantship/student work/ fellowships. So to the point it might end up being free, apart from time spent, but it’s not like I’m doing anything particularly profitable with my time now…
It’s cybersecurity, and I’ve got some really complex mixed feelings about that. I can understand the essential part of it, but a large part of it is smoke and mirrors. Watching the presentation last night I got that same feeling I got in undergrad; “I wonder how much of this is just built up to assure people jobs.” Because the jargon is so thick, and they can use a lot of words to say nothing at all.
I really just don’t believe someone can do something for the good of someone else without having a vested interest of some kind, and too often that vested interest is to exploit people out of their labor. So it’s less of a them thing and more of a me thing.
Tug of war between that I have really strong academics, I probably DID earn my seat, and the knowledge that I’m definitely not being told everything, and I don’t know if that puts me in danger of being exploited.
oh well if it could be free or minimal debt, then that might be worth it. are there recent graduates of the program you could talk to and ask if it was worth it?
“I don’t know if that puts me in danger of being exploited.”
–>Ah modern society, they are always trying to exploit us. Whether it’s colleges, employers, the rich, the politicians, etc. Hell, even our so-called “friends” exploit us.
This is why I’m a loner. The last few years especially, SO many wolves at the door trying to use or exploit me for some reason or another. That’s also part of why I turn angry and bitter.
well good luck man. seeing as how you’ve already started the program, i’m assuming you’ll finish it. maybe cybersecurity would be good for you, who knows.
First thing: DON’T cut your hair, not for any amount. Aside from the obvious (compromising who you are), I swear that long hair or any rebellious feature will work to your advantage in the end. That is if you actually have talent and work ethic, which it sounds like you have flooding out your pores. At my last job there was a senior engineer who had shoulder length hair. He pulled it back in a tight ponytail so there was never an issue of him looking disheveled, but still there were always whispers about him being “eccentric”, “odd” or sometimes outright “looney”. The thing is, I realized all these things were said with admiration because across the board everyone agreed he was the smartest and most dedicated person at the company. I think the hair was part of his schtick. In other words: work it.
About the sales pitch… yeah that’s kinda weird. I guess all institutions, schools & jobs have a mandatory orientation thing that ya just gotta endure. It’s usually put together by the HR department because they’re bored and want to feel like they’re doing something productive. All the same, yeah the school is using you, just like a corporation uses its employees or an army uses its soldiers… But the key is to make it a symbiotic relationship where you use them right back. You’re after that degree on the wall & their gold embossed stamp of approval. Everything between now & that moment is sauce for the goose.
Last thought about your issues seeming silly compared to other stuff here. Nah man, pain & problems are totally subjective which is why I never subscribed to the “other people have it worse” mentality. It’s also why I’m obsessed with suicides of the rich, famous, bold & beautiful. The human mind will always find problems in every situation, and that’s one of the few traits of humans I actually admire: a drive to become greater even if it kills us. The downside is tgat sometimes it does kill us.
unless…the hair prevents him from getting hired. not every person is going to think a man having long hair is “cool.” I personally don’t mind, I grew up/live in very liberal environments where it is cool for a man to have long hair, but…it depends where you live, what your profession is, some professions give more leeway than others, some not so much. There are some people who see a man with long hair and automatically will not hire you. OP probably knows how it is. Some view long hair same as they do to tattoos and piercings.
true there’s always some degree of selling out, even if it’s wearing a suit to the interview when you’d rather wear ripped jeans and a pearl jam t-shirt. But I think our physical bodies are our last bastion of individuality, and if a potential company can’t see beyond it to see our skills & value then it’s a sign of bad things to come.
granted if we’re just talking about a throwaway gig like delivering packages for UPS (highly lucrative I hear, but you definitely gotta wear the uniform so to speak) then yeah there’s no point in trying to be a rebel. But if it’s a lifelong career move which it sounds like viking is thinking about, I think it’s best to establish your identity at the outset, demand their respect or find a better company that will.
I had a very uh.,.. distinguishing part of my appearance that everyone warned me I’d have to change, but as far as I know it never hurt my job offers or earning potential. Maybe coworkers whispered behind my back like they did about longhair man, but I was so good at my job that nobody raised a peep to my face. that experience taught me a lot about self confidence. I may be a colossal fuckup in other areas of society, but self confidence (without arrogance) is something I got down pat.
yeah, the hair is a thing my parents go round and round with me about. They want me to cut it. Geez my mother has shorter hair than me…. though we’ve already discussed what I think about her position in placating authorities. I had a few jobs where I had to have short hair for safety reasons, and so I did… something about rebelling against it has me growing it out.
It’s actually the exact same as something, I talk about how I revamped my image regarding romantic relationships in my early 20s. Something I don’t mention much was that during that time I started smoking. My ex wife had a major thing against smokers. I wanted to repel anyone like her.
So the hair is just like that; I’ve had employers who have issues with hair length, peircings, etc. That type of employer is toxic, if I can pull my hair back I look fine. I have a full beard too, and the long hair and the full beard, I feel beautiful, and like I’m in control of my life.
I was researching ancient kings and it used to be when a king got conquered the first thing they did was cut all his hair off, because long hair was associated with vitality and strength. The required haircut is much the same to me. It’d be different if there was a safety reason, but there isn’t. I’m not physically up to jobs with that kind of requirement anyway
That’s wild about kings. Come to think of it, short hair on men seems like a distinctly 20th century thing. From biblical times thru the Romantic age, all the heroic male figures had long hair. That plus a full beard is definitely the classic kingly look. Ha maybe one of the reasons nobody respect british monarchy is because all the men look like doofuses.
Anyway yeah, I also understand the added bonus of weeding out any toxic/judgmental relationships, both professional as well as private. Like flying a warning flag: if you cant deal with the way I am then back off.
If you can make yourself a valuable commodity with your skills then you can make any look fly. That would be the pinnacle of beating the system.
“Ha maybe one of the reasons nobody respect british monarchy is because all the men look like doofuses.”
->Or maybe bc they’re pedophiles (Prince Andrew) and thieves that have robbed country after country of their wealth? but yes, many of them do look like doofuses, likely due to inbreeding.
“Or maybe bc they’re pedophiles (Prince Andrew) and thieves that have robbed country after country of their wealth?”
lmao….. thattttt might have something to do with it
yup, and it’s insane how much ppl revere the monarchy. like why? their sole purpose was to pillage the nation, and to plunder all nations around the world of their natural resources or their labor.
when Queen Elizabeth died, I didn’t get all hub-bub and tears and all that fawning. Like…why?
What about the MILLIONS of poor people that die every year who lack housing or proper healthcare? No one weeps for THEM.
what about the MILLIONS of people who were so miserable with their lives who decided to commit suicide? No one weeps for THEM.
What about the MILLIONS of working class people who work FULL TIME and yet still need to be on public assistance? who work till they’re 65, only to die at 66. who work shit jobs that pay shit wages all their life with a “promise” of a paid for retirement. Except they don’t tell you 2/3 of ALL people die BEFORE they’re able to collect retirement. who weeps for those people? NO ONE.
but sure, weep for the poor rich megalomaniacs who’s wealth is based on plundering and theft. and slavery.
I hope my monarchy comment wasn’t too off base. It was an outshoot of my continued attempts to understand Europe from the year 1200 to 1800. I don’t think I’m even close. But it resonated with me, one of the Holy Roman Emperors was captured and had his hair cut off, and that was it. Like how nice was it that was the solution?
It’s all part of some weird stuff though. For one the Holy Roman Empire wasn’t particularly holy, nor Roman, nor was it much of an empire. In terms of governance it was closer to the current United States. It was a plutocracy, the princes all held marginal sway over the “empire”. The Hapbsburgs while also being bloody tyrants were just good at getting the entire ruling class pointed in the same direction.
That is, until Napoleon. Say what you will, Napoleon is the reason for a lot of social changes in the last two hundred and fifty years. He was the most successful modern conqueror, but in the end even his own country denied him and exiled him. Anyway the psychic wound of the dismantling of the Holy Roman Empire was known on a global stage during WW1 and WW2. That massive build up of alliances that led to the first world war? It looked a lot like the early Holy Roman Empire…. it just didn’t work as well.
Turns out the catholic church was the real power in that relationship. Which I’m not even going to get into the awful things done by the catholic church. I don’t know what my point was…. The British Monarchy is terrible, I agree on that point. It should have been phased out when their empire broke up 70 years ago.
They didn’t kill all the Hapsburgs either, turns out. Just stripped them of their titles. There’s a current heir to the house of Hapsburg, some very obscure person who is probably intensely rich because their name happens to be Hapsburg.
“Say what you will, Napoleon is the reason for a lot of social changes in the last two hundred and fifty years.”
–>Interesting. I did not know that. Hell, I got an A in school and I don’t remember jack shit anything we’ve been taught. But then again, 90% of the stuff we’ve been taught has turned out to be lies and propaganda, which is just as well I don’t remember anything I’ve been “taught.”
European history wasn’t even covered in my school years. And like you said, a lot of it turned out to be propaganda. It’s a shame, because real history is quite interesting, though that might be my idealism showing. Up until recently I thought the reformation was the most violent period in European history, and it isn’t even close.
More fun history facts, the title of Emperor of the Romans was first given to Charlemagne, who single handedly spread Christianity across Europe with the edge of a sword. Prior to that you had various tribes and their own tribal beliefs. So the pope in “gratitude” crowned him king of the Romans, true heir to the ancient Roman Empire, which had been defunct at least 400 years at that point.
But inheritance laws back then were weird, things were split evenly between offspring. Charlemagne had three sons so each got a piece of his empire. One of the three managed to get to Rome and be crowned, but he didn’t produce an heir, so it was just endless bloody war over who could get to Rome first and get crowned for hundreds of years.
and we thought we had it bad! Imagine living in that world, and without the ability to read.
I guess you could say the French Revolution is to blame for everything Napoleon did, because without it there would be no Napoleon. Maybe that’s the way the story goes; French Revolution destabilized the monarchy system, and it fell all over Europe.
I don’t know whether to call Napoleon a hero or a tyrant though. He had some decent ideals that he put in place for the areas he conquered, and I do appreciate him helping end the monarchy. It’s just the German influence in me that’s sympathetic to what it must have been like for those areas he conquered. To have an alien culture forced on you, sounds terrible.
Oh and of course Napoleon killed a lot of people…. but I’m convinced fascism in Spain and Germany would have had a much harder time taking root if it wasn’t for him. So a mixed legacy
last fun Napoleon fact; when he died the doctor performing the autopsy removed his privates, and they were sold from person to person for hundreds of years. The last time it changed hands was in 1977 for $3,000.
lol, the peasants aren’t allowed to learn about real history. we aren’t allowed to learn they routinely screw us over and suppress us and are continuing to screw us over. and that by banding together, the peasants sometimes win. they cannot allow the peasants to learn that fact.
just look at the yellow vests in France. the news is everywhere in the world. But news of that is suppressed in the USA. Its never mentioned in US MSM. Can’t lets the peasants know that riots actually work.
“The British Monarchy is terrible, I agree on that point.”
–>Yet they’re constantly revered in American and British MSM. Constant fawning of the royals. And the American populace falls for that shit.
Going back to hair, a completely non-important subject lol, men have traditionally and historically had long hair. Throughout the past, in most countries/continents.
It’s only in recent modern times that men have cut their hair and that style become the only “acceptable” version for men.