I really don’t want to have to go back home. It’s dysfunctional and the place I’d get is TINY and not great. Also then I’d have to deal with family shit. Also there is nothing for me in that city/state.
But idk where else I can go. I can try overseas but idk. I’m just too sick and depressed to make it work. It what I had wanted to do, but my confidence has been shot thanks to this vulnerable narcissist that purposely kicked me in the face while i was down bc she relishes in hurting people (you evil ****).
idk if i should try overseas or just go home.
i WANT to go overseas but idk if i can do it. if i dont take the place, it will be rented out and if i try going overseas and i fail, then i have nowhere to go. but if i go home, money will be spent to fix it up and they’re going to be pissed if i don’t stay. i want it to be a pit stop to go if i need a place to stay. overseas idea requires coming back home every now and then. hard to fully live overseas and never come back to the US.
bc money will be spent to fix up the place so it’s liveable, i’m then obligated to stay for some time.