It pisses me off that everyone says that shit. NO, there are many things that you just don’t forget or are able to “get over.” First of all, it’s not a choice. NO ONE wants to be traumatized nor do we want to be mentally screwed up over shit that’s happened in the past.
Like say for example a girl gets raped. Do you tell her to “just get over it” bc it’s “the past”? FFS
People who say that are shitty uncaring people, and have NEVER experienced trauma or horrendous things. If they did, they’d know that it’s not easy to “just get over it” or that it’s even a choice. They seriously think people who are abused, raped, or traumatized or whatever has happened to them CHOOSES to be miserable and depressed.
Like WTF is wrong with people that they think depressed ppl CHOOSE to be depressed? Like literally NO ONE ever fucking chooses to be depressed. And if we are depressed, it’s bc we CHOOSE to be miserable and unhappy.
I wish everyone in the world would experience some deep pain for a week or a month so they’d fucking understand. What is lacking in this world is some empathy, compassion and understanding.
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Anyone that acts like what you described is likely an abusive person, unlike normal people, out there.
That’s another thing, when someone abusive isolates, shames, or lashes out, the world starts looking like the abusive person. That’s why victims of abuse put themselves last. They start blaming themselves in the end.
It sets them up for more abuse. And endless cycle.
no it’s not abusive people- it’s literally everyone who does NOT have depression telling me to “just get over it.” People who do not have depression do not know just how hard it is to “get over” things
funny how all the people who tell you to forget the past have shitty memory
or have never had really shitty things happen to THEM.
thats probably closer to the truth. Ive found that traumatic events create deep scars in our memory that dont just fade away. I suck at remembering facts & figures but i can tell you every photographic detail of a traumatic event that happened 10 years ago. unbroken people will never understand
exactly. they just look at us with disgust and tell us we’re weak when they couldn’t go through half the shit some of us have gone through. notice how these ppl, the second a MINOR thing happens to them, go ballistic and crying and weeping and all emo when 2s earlier they were telling us to “just get over it.”
Its a hard thing to hear because it sounds insensitive and unempathetic. But it is something I’ve been trying to tell myself lately. Traumas need to be acknowledged and processed… but wallowing too long don’t help. Just traps me in bad patterns of thought. Lately I’m been wondering if I can just get some kind of hypnosis to forget.
For what it’s worth, I dont think people have bad intention when they say things like that. I like to believe they’re just trying to help, even if they say the wrong thing. Maybe I’m wrong in your specific case, I just don’t like believing the worst in people. It makes everything harder
yeah but it’s not like i haven’t tried to forget it and move on. there are things that were done to me that affect me to this day- for example physically. i can’t just “forget” things that are still present and issues for me every single day of my life.
and regarding of emotional stuff- it’s not like i haven’t tried to “get over” that either. if i could, i would’ve done that ages ago. it’s not like i haven’t already tried everything under the sun. maybe for some traumas for some people, it just will never go away.