Just Another Mind Dump

So a couple of updates. My last couple of posts from about a month ago was me stressing over potentially failing out of grad school. So I finally get my grades and I was wrong. I passed. I have absolutely no idea why and it makes me a little scared to talk to the professor. I guess that will be a problem for another time. So now that I have decided to stay. I’m in Worcester for the summer now. I got a job at a grocery store for the deli section. I’m not very good at it yet. Tomorrow’s my third day and I’m going to be closing by myself. I’ll probably screw something up.

Even though it’s summer I still have to continue with lab work. I have been avoiding it to be honest. Using the excuse of my new job to avoid it. It’s mainly because of my lab partner. He’s polite with me and never seems to be bothered when I don’t know something, but I know that really he finds me to be troublesome. He knows that I’m no good and a fuck up. He must look down on me. Talking to him is kind of excrutiating. With me other teammate it’s a little bit better. It’s easier to talk to her but you can tell she feels sorry for me. Both are miles and miles ahead of me and I don’t think I’m capable of getting to even a fraction of where they are. I know it’s bad to asume what people think of you, but I can’t help but feel so uncomfortable when I talk to them. I meant it when I said I wanted to continue with school. But only to see how far I go. I know I’m not going to get my Masters. I know I’m going to flunk out eventually. It’s stuff like this that reminds me of this fact.

Anyways, that’s just a little bit of what’s been on my mind. Besides that I’ve been playing a lot of Zelda. Beat Tears of the Kingdom and I’m close to beating A Link to the Past. Will probably start on Majora’s Mask next. I’ve got a bad feeling about this summer, but I always have a bad feeling about everything. Hope you guys are doing alright. I haven’t been around for a bit, but even when I’m not posting I like to comment to try and make people feel a bit better. Should do that more. Anyways, thanks for listening for abit.