bait and switch update

I very seriously thougbt about hunting down the original post, but for several reasons including how older posts don’t seem to get revisited often, this is where I’m putting the update.

I’ve officially submitted the paperwork to drop out of grad school, after a second semester start that undermined my faith in the process. The supposed drop with no cost date is Friday, so I have to keep pushing until then else I owe $25k…… That’s a car, what grad school is worth more than a car. Literally my most expensive car, my F250 truck which has had a transmission rebuild, full suspension rebuild, and numurous engine tweeks including a complete exhaust rebuild…. all in was still less than that. IDK, seems like a lot to me, for a semester of an online degree of undetermined career value in the worst job market in a CENTURY.

Just sayin’, it takes a lot of nerve to ask for that much with a straight face and only offering $1300 per semester in work study. and by nerve I mean the roughly spherical elements of male anatomy which is roughly approximated as nerve. They’ve been trying to kick me in the “nerve”, so to say. Luckily, I have the jock strap of apathy and cynicism.

Monday I started working on my disability application….. which was another kind of weird. For most of my life, I’ve always tried to downplay my health problems…. because honesty is for suckers in this market. Now with the help of my case manager, I’m finally coming clean about how truly feeble I am. For one thing, that my disability started in 2017…. because I haven’t had a career success since then. I spent 3 years in college keeping a 4.0 GPA…. but that is economically meaningless, turns out. I’m a published researcher, again, meaningless in terms of work.

This thing is going to take a lot out of my self value, because government agencies feed on human misery. *sigh*

eh.

My parents totally got me not taking out the debt, but they immediately started talking about me going back to work…. as in starting trying NOW… they don’t get it. I was only chasing the degree because I knew if it was funded there was a greater than 50% chance I could finish the degree and derive value from it. The chances on a job application any time before three months into actually working the job? Less than 5% chance I’ll get more than I give. I’m supposed to work for free for three months on what an honor it is to have a job….

and somehow, they don’t get what a stupid equation that is, how misguided the people offering jobs are in thinking I’d take another three month bet of my limited time on this planet alive just because MAYBE they’ll pay me for the effort, eventually, check is in the mail, promise…..

I’d go work for a drunk homeless man over employers in this market. Not joking. Employers are so entitled these days I’d trust a five year old before I’d trust someone who “pays” payroll taxes. Pays being hypothetical because most businesses don’t pay taxes. In fact, we the tax payers pay THEM. Frickin welfare queen corperate assholes. and yet I’m the “moocher” for wanting to be paid for my time, because big daddy state government isn’t going to give me an interest free $1 million dollar loan then forgive it a year later. That’s where MY tax dollars go, when I can find work that doesn’t cost me more than my commute and daily diet to work at…….

I’m ticked off. I’ve worked hard for most of my life, trying to make good, and the system has been sucking me dry. Now I’m middle aged, sick, and thinking it’d be better to take my assets and run. Engaging in this economy is something I can’t do, because I’m not young, and I don’t have three months to work for FREE and not get paid.