I did my interview today, and I think I did decent. The thing about it, I won’t know for awhile if I did well enough.
I’ve been over it with my wife and father, and they both said I should just keep going, keep looking.
Even though it might be futile. Especially, it seems to me. Panel interviews are tough to begin with, a panel with three cops (one of whom is the chief of police), and a member of city counsel. I’ve never had so many important people looking at me for an hour.
and that’s just it, I’m not important, not yet anyway. Maybe I will be, it would be nice to be important.
but I just have to keep sowing the seed, or ploughing the damn field, seems the same way of saying praying for good soil, no pests and just the right amount of rain. Which is a fair point, if I homestead I’d be trusting as much in faith as I am here. Good ol’ agnostic amatuer theologian me. Jesus talked a lot about soil, more than about a good amount else. Fishers of men too. Not much about lures though, or fertilizer. I swear it’s relevant. If you’re fishing and you aren’t pulling up what you are looking for, you look at your lure. Maybe it’s the wrong lure. If your plants aren’t growing right, you add stuff to the soil to help it. Neither of those jobs are exactly passive, not if you’re counting on some kind of return.
but sometimes you pull back empty nets, and the crops fail, and somehow you’ve still got to get up and try again
that’s what I’m getting at. I think that’s what’s required, and that’s why it’s so damn hard. When you’ve tried your hardest, and it still might not be enough.