Yeah, that’s how I feel in society I am an alien, I am alien to mankind and feel like I don’t belong, been given the feeling I don’t. I feel alienated to what people have become – or always have been? I don’t know. How come ‘humanity’ is this disgusting mess of people torturing, murdering others indifferently? We have genocides, wars, hunger, murder, the inhumane exploitation and slaughter of animals in numbers almost 10x as high as our entire (out of control) 8 billion population (excluding trillions of fish). The world is burning, literally and in every regard, and somehow no one cares? Or at least not enough people care? How can it be that all these things are getting more and more out of hand in spite of the internet and increased education? I don’t understand how some of the world leaders can look into the mirror and be okay with what they’ve done, what they’re *continuing doing*? HOW?
I am SO fed up with this world, my miserable mind and my never-ending excruciating thoughts and feelings. The more I learn each day, the more desperate I get. Sometimes I wonder if it would be better to not care, to be indifferent of all this suffering and injustice but that’s not the answer. Also I am questioning why I keep informing myself about all this, I can’t make a difference. And also I don’t have the capacity for any of this right now. I feel overwhelmed with the world, with life, with people, with myself. I hate myself and what I’ve become and the world? I might hate that even more.