It’s been days since I came to the Suicide Project. During this time, I got back with my ex, and we sorted out the mistakes we each made. We are good now. He is very sweet, loving, calm, and composed. I long to give him all my love, and we are working on improving our lives together.
However, my connection with people around me continues to get fucked up day by day . I fear it might happen with my boyfriend too. It’s frustrating to be friends with people in college. I see everyone as soul-sucking monsters who are filthy, sick, and selfish to the extreme. They have no sense of what they are doing to others. Beep them. Beep, beep, beep.
In my imagination i want them all to stand in line and rip out their heart like how sza did in kill bill single album . Screw them actually that doesn’t matter at all but i feel pity how these people are being stupid dumb ass’s …….
People I thought as friends left me and I fucking dont care about it . Juz now i called my bf … I want to talk with him cuz i am not in a good mood . But he said that he want to hear music and get vibe so he hanged up indirectly saying it. I am just adjusting on people reacting to me in my life and moving on . I am sick of this fucking cycle . I don’t know I hate being around anyone now .
All in my mind is to be like a cocoon in a small room without human intervention . Just laying off and not caring about these fucked up cooked up shit .