I had the most pointless psychiatric appointment today. I decided to be upfront about my depression and suicidal ideations. Didn’t see any point in not doing so. It was what he was being paid for. But I forgot how pointless it was to tell him. Got the usual spiel. Have you tried taking a break? Exercise regularly? Would it help to increase the dosage? Pointless. Apparently he’s going to send me a list of therapists as well. I thought I was paying extra so he could do psychotherapy as well. I guess he just wants to hand out pills and leave it at that. They all are like that really.
Got some interviews today that were really weird. One for a technician role that seemed real eager to just get me to work. I think it’s contract based. I actually need to double check. Got the same thing but for an actual engineering role. That I know for a fact is contract based. I don’t want to be chained to a contract I can’t get out of. Especially for the second one where they want me traveling 85% of the time. Because in the -0.01% chance I actually get a fellowship or funding, I won’t be able to attend WPI. I’m sure the way it works is that if I don’t take one of these jobs, I won’t get any funding. If I do take it, I’ll get the funding but won’t be able to attend. Whatever scenario is the most painfully ironic is likely to happen. Long story short, those two jobs are sketchy as fuck but I don’t have any options left. Of course.