What if we’ve been dumbasses and have made all the wrong decisions in life? And hence we are in the situation we are in now?
We all like to think we are smart. And some of us are very academically smart. And some of us do have common sense.
BUT- What if we been making stupid ass choices? Choices that aren’t Necessarily obvious that it’s stupid?
Like choosing to go after career vs finding a soulmate.
Like choosing to stay home and hermit instead of going out, meeting ppl or just going for solo walks, Exercising, eating right, etc.
I mean, yes, when we get depressed, we don’t eat properly, we don’t exercise, we don’t go out, we isolate in every way possible, etc. It’s fine if it’s just a few days or even a few weeks.
But the chronically depressed, like me- we routinely engage in bad habits and not do things we ought to do (stay active, eat well, have some kind of human contact, etc).
I mean that’s one part of it. The obvious part. And there’s the non-obvious bad decisions (like choosing career over finding love, or choosing to move to that apt or that city which was a total mistake, and now you’re stuck or have no energy to leave).
What if things ARE our fault? I mean there are so many things that are not our fault but they set us up to fail- ie poverty, lack of GOOD options, so we’re only choosing between less bad options/outcomes. Or the things we actually have control over (like eating healthy, going out, making friends, not isolating etc) that we’re still not doing?
Like I am tired of going out and meeting people who are terrible or turn out to be users and manipulators. Also, it saps what little energy we have. But if we DON’T go out and we isolate, in the long run it makes us worse, When this goes on for years.
Studies show that People who do not have friends, family, a robust social life- No I only die younger but I have all sorts of health problems, both physical and mental, related to being alone and lonely.
I’m too tired to write a proper detailed post to explain what I mean, but I think you all get a sense of what I mean. Like when people are depressed, We don’t necessarily make the best choices, which then makes our situation even worse.
But when you’re in a depressed situation, or in a bad environment, it is hard to get out of it unless you have the energy and the willpower, things that a depressed person does not have. And then we become stuck. Stuck in a shitty situation. Like being stuck in quicksand.
We, the depressed, pretty much have given up trying to get OUT of the quicksand, Because many of us have tried before, only to get one leg out only to get stuck again.
It’s like we’ve tried time and again to get out of the quicksand, and we may have almost gotten out and freed ourselves, Only to sink back in again before we can reach solid ground.
I guess life kind of feels like that. Except we’re the mofos who’ve given up. And stop struggling to get out of the quicksand. We’re like chest deep, so it is very difficult to get out.
Also, it’s like they you’re there and overeating so now you’re even fatter and harder to get out of the quicksand. But you’re also still reaching for the comfort foods- like pastries, junk food, pizza, soda, coffee, alcohol etc.
Can you reach for a temporary “good feel” but that only makes you worse off. Metaphorically and physically.