I want to die just to see if anyone would care. I want to die but I don’t want to be dead forever. I wonder if anyone would listen if I told them I that I wanted to die. Would anyone take me seriously? Or would they think nothing of it. Would they talk me out of suicide if they knew how depressed I am? Who is ”they” anyways, there’s no one I trust with any of this. Because people finding out about me is my biggest fear. I am too ashamed and embarrassed to talk about any of this. So right now I am living life all alone by myself, because people are too disappointing.
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Someone would probably care. Out of all the people you know, just using percentages, there would be at least one person who would be sad.
I’m sorry you have no one to talk to. If you want, you can send me an email. It’s scarswithmarshmellowsAThotmail. I’m a pretty good listener.
I think all of us wonder those things. The sad part is that “they” (whoever they are) usually don’t take suicide seriously until it happens. I read all these posts from people who have begged their parents & family for help, and nobody gives a damn.
Maybe it’s better to keep it a secret. All I know is it really sucks to bare your soul and have it fall on deaf ears.
I care. I am listening. I know how hard it is to keep this secret, and at the same time how hard it is not to. I would care if you were gone. I lost a former student a few months ago; she could not possibly have predicted the vast size of the crater she left in the ground when she left us. We tried so hard to save her…for years….we tried everything we could….and still we lost her. I will never be the same. She has no idea just how much I miss her. I would have done anything for her. Now I’m just left with a great painful hole in my heart where she should be. Many people can disappoint, but there are some good ones out there. Just keep looking…I do. Sometimes they turn up in the most unexpected places (like here!).
I used to think that. I have been in your shoes, and it really does hurt. I care. I really do. I feel physical pain just from reading stories like this were people pore their hearts out, only to get it shattered again. I will listen to you, whether you want to talk about the things that are hurting you, or completely avoid the subject. Just know that someone really does care. My email is hetariuss at yahoo