Cutting used to make me feel alive but now I honestly don’t feel it anymore unless it’s deeper and the knife is sharper so now I go on roofs for no reason and I actually ended up making money by cleaning peoples gutters so now I just try to find bigger houses to climb up
Fair dos. I have to admit, ever since I accepted my own mortality several years back, I have a happy disregard for my own safety. Not quite to the point of putting myself in danger yet, though. I am just happy to go adventuring wherever my thoughts take me irrespective of the danger. I guess its also a thought for future travels too…
I don’t really know what it means to “feel alive” or to “feel dead.” I’ve never died, therefore I don’t know what it means to feel anything other than alive.
If you mean “what makes that crushing, restless void in your soul go away?” Then I don’t know how to answer. I can distract myself from it but nothing can make it go away.
Few things, but it varies. I guess i can’t pinpoint one in particular, but an accurate description would be: anything out of the ordinary that happens at some moment where i’m able to shake off my usual pessimism. No idea if that makes sense.
Luckily, I have a few concerts lined up. It always makes me feel alive. Comedy can make me feel alive. Amazing sex can make me feel alive. Delicious food can make me feel alive. Mostly music.
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Cutting used to make me feel alive but now I honestly don’t feel it anymore unless it’s deeper and the knife is sharper so now I go on roofs for no reason and I actually ended up making money by cleaning peoples gutters so now I just try to find bigger houses to climb up
Ha, so I’m not the only person who likes to go on rooftops 😛
It’s awesome that you now get paid to do it lol
Fair dos. I have to admit, ever since I accepted my own mortality several years back, I have a happy disregard for my own safety. Not quite to the point of putting myself in danger yet, though. I am just happy to go adventuring wherever my thoughts take me irrespective of the danger. I guess its also a thought for future travels too…
Sex
Dammit. Why wasnt that my first thought?! Hahaha
Because you are not a pro and not an addict.
Running in the dark
I don’t really know what it means to “feel alive” or to “feel dead.” I’ve never died, therefore I don’t know what it means to feel anything other than alive.
If you mean “what makes that crushing, restless void in your soul go away?” Then I don’t know how to answer. I can distract myself from it but nothing can make it go away.
Few things, but it varies. I guess i can’t pinpoint one in particular, but an accurate description would be: anything out of the ordinary that happens at some moment where i’m able to shake off my usual pessimism. No idea if that makes sense.
I am at a loss. The things I used to do that made me feel alive, I can no longer do. What can fill this void??
Little things…. laughter, the wind in my hair, making someone smile, etc… it is these little scattered moments.
Luckily, I have a few concerts lined up. It always makes me feel alive. Comedy can make me feel alive. Amazing sex can make me feel alive. Delicious food can make me feel alive. Mostly music.