I wish I had never had friends, they suck…. Like I still have them, but it’s still just shit. A few of them decided it would be a good idea to date each other, and that was a thing for a little bit, on and off…. And now they finally decided that they hate each other, and it’s not like I don’t even care about one of them…. They were both in the same circle of friends, and the other peoples in the circle sort of vanished in the past month or so too…. So basically the entire circle is just gone. And today I spent time with one of them, and ran into the other and it was sort of awkward, then they sort of ignored my frantic apology texts for a bit (although that was honestly probably due to them working) and basically just stated that they didn’t care and felt that the other was just talking shit about them, and then went on to talk shit about them…. I hate this, I wish they weren’t such idiots and either never did this entire dating thing, or made it work, or maybe just weren’t children about it when they decided it didn’t work out…. Wow, I was so happy with how things were going too…. And now everything is broken much sooner than I hoped that it would…. -_- I am really surprised I haven’t done anything to hurt myself too much yet…. I’ve really been wanting to, but I have removed everything I have enough comfort with to use from my house. So I would either have to start experimenting (which I sadly sort of have started a bit of with the stove -_- ) until comfortable enough to do decent amounts of damage, or go and buy razors or something else fun like that…. The first is actually more likely…. Or maybe I left some razors somewhere that I forgot about…. -_-
Also my fucking glasses broke today…. Fuck everything. At least I will probably be able to go to bed soon, as I am fairly tired…. But I will feel like the day was wasted then, as I’ve just got home…. (there was a lot of things today) -_- But I guess at least I won’t be doing anything regrettable if I’m sleeping…. I also have a bottle and a half of NyQuil in my closet…. That could make me sleep if needed -_- But I already used that yesterday when this shit started happening…. I don’t really want to do it again, the sleep from it isn’t at all restful…. But it’s nice during, and comes with really strange dreams…. My drawings for my class at least didn’t totally suck…. I actually feel kind of happy about them, and was actually sort of wanting to show them off to people (which I did with my father and grandfather). That’s not a normal thing for me to feel about anything I do, and it is kind of nice…. I don’t really want to show them off here just in case somebody that I know hangs around here (never know) and then they would know who I am without any doubt, (although I already shared a lot of things that they could probably use for a decent guess but never be totally sure of) but maybe I will draw some things that I won’t show to people IRL to share here…. That could work have like two sketch books, or sketch book sections….
Wow this was ranty and didn’t stay on topic at all times (or even really had a topic (which most of my posts don’t really have a topic)) But grrrr it does feel nice to share this sort of stuffs…. Sorry for some of the language I used, my vocabulary does vary from day to day…. Is sort of weird some times I’m in a cursy (that’s probably not even a word -_-) sort of mood while others I’m in more of a softer words sort of mood, among various other moods. Wow again off topic on the outro…. Welp thanks for reading I guess (if you did -_- ) and I hope you has a good day. 😀 Also How’s things going for you? ^-^
1 comment
Hey there, just dropping in to say hello. I did read your post.
I’ve been feeling off, partially avoiding SP… :/