I used to sound like you theChimeraMonster and it all changed as soon as I stopped being absolutely and utterly focused on death all the time. When we are so focused solely on one thing we can’t expect to see anything else.
I really want to help you to find more than just thoughts of suicide because you can go out and have good times worth living for. You might always have this underlying feeling but you can get some relief.
but if this relief dont last, what is the purpose of trying it? I have done this for the last 13 years of my life, trying to be strong, to be resilient. But im aproaching my limits here. Nothing wrong happened, but still, these horrible feelings are the only thing i get from life. Living here is getting too heavy to be worth it.
it started for me when i was between 7/8 years old. It never did get out my head. The feelings “you should fade away” and “youre not worth any kind of love they showed towards you” are constant, sometimes weaker, but always there
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… theres one thing, Death
I used to sound like you theChimeraMonster and it all changed as soon as I stopped being absolutely and utterly focused on death all the time. When we are so focused solely on one thing we can’t expect to see anything else.
I really want to help you to find more than just thoughts of suicide because you can go out and have good times worth living for. You might always have this underlying feeling but you can get some relief.
but if this relief dont last, what is the purpose of trying it? I have done this for the last 13 years of my life, trying to be strong, to be resilient. But im aproaching my limits here. Nothing wrong happened, but still, these horrible feelings are the only thing i get from life. Living here is getting too heavy to be worth it.
The relief does last after you make a practice and a habit out of keeping your thoughts clean.
Has it always been this bad for you in these 13 years?
Bullet
it started for me when i was between 7/8 years old. It never did get out my head. The feelings “you should fade away” and “youre not worth any kind of love they showed towards you” are constant, sometimes weaker, but always there
An easy life.
It would have to be some pretty good drugs to make this world tolerable.