After I found out….. I just gave up. My friend offered to take me in after my sick sadistic retard mom made me stay with a family of narcissistic sociopaths for two years… That alone drove me into a mental institution. And our mental healthcare system is so fucked
They didn’t care why or how I got there… Not that I told them anyway. Not the real reason, just part of it. I wasn’t about to tell them I talk to myself without realizing it. Why would I give them an advantage like that over me, something to torture and prod me with… I just told them I lived with a fat, sloven demented fuckpile sociopath who brainwashed my mom into being his slave and tried to break my mind and make me his servant
I refused my friend’s offer… After all that time I was finally free… But I was imprisoned in another way, a much worse way…
It didn’t take long before my mind started changing. A deep disturbance had reached down inside me. They can all hear me… They can hear me.
I can’t stop fixing on stupid and fucked up shit
They think they can hear my thoughts
Get out
These are my thoughts
My feelings
You have no right
Just kill me
Weed makes it worse. It also makes me aware of it. I chased off the only person who could’ve helped me. I often check out their social media and they recently blocked it so now they think I’m a stalker. And maybe I am. But what else am I supposed to do? I can’t be around people. The only thing I can do is look at what would have been my life from the inside of this vacuum in which I subsist.
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Yeah….my bf at the time was gonna offer me a place to stay, his mom even said I could (we were in high school) and he did it without my knowledge. Just as he was about to tell me i broke up with him because i wasnt good enough for him.
I also find weed makes it worse. Makes me more paranoid and all that good stuff.