I know I’m not the only one with problems. I know I have it good, comparatively. I know that I should be perfectly okay. But I’m not. I know, logically, that I should feel something, but I do not. I can only say I’m sorry for my pain, or rather, lack thereof. They say they love me, I think that is stupid. I’m not good enough for anyone. I know that this should hurt, should make me sad, but it’s like I’m a black hole, nothing there, the epitome of absence. I cant fix it without hurting them. But I hurt them by not fixing it…
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No, you don’t have to be perfectly ok, nor feel something that you do not. If you don’t feel anything, don’t try to feel something. That’s it, that’s all. Why would your absence of feelings hurt those who love you? And yeah, love is stupid: that’s exactly the point of it. They don’t love you because you deserve it: no one deserves to be loved. They love you without reason and that’s the most beautiful kind of love. As for me, I embrace life like it is, not like it “should be”, for I am grateful for everything that is… and everything that is not.