Today was bearable. The cold after a few nice warm days kinda put a dent in my mood, but it’s fine I guess. I really need to shower while I’m like this, before it all goes to shit again and I go weeks without doing so. I’m still able to eat, I actually was able to get something I dont usually get for lunch, and I was able to eat everything for the first time in forever (I tend to get really sick after like 5 bites or something idk why) I ate a little dinner but I was still full from lunch.

Turns out I’m failing 2 classes – easy classes – but I turned everything in today so hopefully it’ll be a little better… I’ve just been so unmotivated. Not an excuse for laziness. School has just been getting more and more stressful. My dad will get called if I still have failing grades so… I hope they hurry and get them in and they’ll not be failing.

I’ve been making myself draw, partner giving me ideas when I have none. I’d like to start writing again, even if its shit. But I cant seem to make myself write anything down. I’ve been playing on my switch a lot and listening to a lot of music.

I’m still dealing with stupid shit in my head… so I’ve just been trying to distract myself however I guess. It doesnt always work. I guess things will be okay eventually, that’s what I keep trying to tell myself. But I dont feel like I deserve to be or feel okay, so then it just starts all over again.