amarie75

—- Hello ? —-—- Goodbye ?—–

Though my looks have not changed much, this is me a little over a year ago. Everyone saw me as the “bright” and “confident” girl. Even had people at hospitals, the Techs, always call me “sunshine” (which I am now practically […]

it’s the hardest thing when you realize you’ve got to let go and literally everything in you is not wanting you to.

three full years of compassion, honesty, loyalty, and love from my best friend and now, for a month, he has not been sure about me anymore.

I don’t know how to let go when all I want to do is communicate with him, tell him I care, etc.

somehow I need to force myself to just not bother. I have no idea how this is going to work..

In advance, I’m sorry. This is just me talking about whatever and trying to understand what I need to do. It helps that many of you can see where I’m coming from. It just helps to “talk” it out sometimes.

one thing I’ve come to realize over the course of this past year is how obsessed with change that I am.

I know many don’t like the idea of change, they want to stay around the same people and even the same city or state, having the same routine, but I’ve never been quite like that. I guess it’s because I got used to moving around schools, […]

So it’s a really confusing thing I’ve been having to ask myself lately; “what’s wrong with me?”

I have had many people tell me they don’t understand and I need to explain, but does anyone else feel like they can’t quite understand themselves either?

Not many people get me when I say “I can’t understand either, I’m sorry” lol, but I really just cannot.

I don’t get myself and I don’t always understand why I’m so scared of so many things causing anxiety or why I’m severely depressed most days without much of a reason.

I don’t know.. it’s pretty confusing.

I am so lost right now. So, yesterday I had started having a panic attack like any other day, except this time I was majorly dizzy and nascious and decided to walk down stairs with being so. I fell down every one of those stairs, had a bloody head, and huge bruises all over my thighs. My mother, being a mother, wanted to look at my legs to see how bad they were and I had totally forgotten about the cuts I had on my thighs, actually scars from literal weeks ago. I stopped cutting and I didn’t intend to cut anymore. At […]