I just dont know why i cant get the words out of my mind. I cant forget anything. I remember every single word or name i was called. I remember every punch. I still have the feeling of being terrified every day to do anything and being worried ill do it wrong and disappoint someone. My mind i slowly killing me and its winning. I cant fight for much longer. I hate more when i don’t know a answer to a question. i cant handle being so weak and stupid. I hate when anybody is disappointed in me. I hate me. I cry when […]
I dont want to die but i dont want to be sad all the time anymore. I want to be happy. I dont want to keep disappointing my family. I want to be able to look at the mirror without crying. I want to live without having to cut. I want to make my dad proud instead of making him wish i was my older sister. I want to take a shower cause i love it and not just cause i have to cry with no one hearing me. I dont want to be ashamed and embarrassed of everything i do and everything i am. […]
Every where i go i feel embarassed and like im being judged and im probly not but i believe it. My sister always yells at me and gets mad at me for no reason and i have to blow it off cause i get in trouble if i yell back cause shes older. If i go to church then the girls there think i wear to much makeup and think i wear low tank tops. I try and make everybody happy but its like i can never be happy cause im making everybody else happy. Everyday i fight myself when i want to cry and […]
my birthday is in 5 days and im usually super excited and this year i wish my birthday would just disappear. I don’t want to celebrate my life cause its not worth celebrating! My wish is to just disappear!
I am cutting harder and hating life more everyday. I really want to talk to somebody but, i told three of my friend and i told them everything but they havent talked to me since. If i told my family that i think im depressed and how i feel they would probably laugh at me and say that im being dramatic. i know for sure that someday i will kill myself because life is slowly killing me little by little every day. My only dream is to be happy. I try to eat as little as possible and i can barely look at myself in […]
Ive always been bullied for cry and i have held alot in for years and now i cry really easily. I cant keep it in. Im scared ill cry in front of someone. Ive always been strong for everybody and only one person has ever seen me really cry. I dont have anybody to be there when i cry. I say strong and have a fake smile on during but when i go in my room lock the dorr and put my headhones in i just loose i and cry for hours and then i cut to make it better. Music is my life but […]
Why did they choose me to bully?? Why did my friends back-stab me? i was nice to them and i spent my money on them and trusted them. They just threw my trust on the ground and stomped on it. I called them my friend but they where two faced bitches. I told them secrets that they promised to keep and they told the whole school my secrets. and then they tried to be my friend again, and i forgave them and they broke my trust over and over until i finally learnde that they will never change! I have heard the word sorry so […]
I don’t have anybody to talk to. I sit alone in my house all the time cause its better than having to fake a smile for any more than i have to. I wish i had someone who knew how i felt and who understood how i feel.
i have been bullied since 1st grade and i only had one true friend that stuck by me through everything and last year she tried to commit suicide. If my friend tries again and succeeds i will also commit suicide cause i couldn’t imagine life without her.