Honest question, one I’ve never had the guts to ask, but I feel like it’s safe to ask here. I grew up ugly, emotionally abused and neglected. It’s all I knew, and every bit of good I did ( raising my sister, joining the Coast Guard, being a good friend no matter what it cost me) was in spite of where and what I came from, not because of it. And I’m tried of fighting against everything I was raised in, just to be a good person. It takes all of my effort just to be normal, and sometimes it doesn’t feel like its worth it. […]
Try not to flinch,
Try not to cry,
Try not to fall,
Try not to Die
It always comes back. All my life, the depression always comes back. I can pull myself out through sheer will power, and I’ll be fine for a week or two, and I think ‘I can do this, all I have to do is not think’.
Then one day I remember what a shit bag I am. How useless, fat, ugly and completely disposeable I am. How broken I am. Someone esle could do my job so much better. So I think, what if I just step aside? What if I just take myeslf out of the picture, so someone else can step up to the plate?
Some […]