The last time I logged in here I was just some kid in high school, things have been rough these last few months but I wanted to log on and tell all of you to keep fighting, nothing is forever, this time 7 years ago when I was logged on here wanting to die, and now I’m at home happily watching my child play with blocks, smiling laughing away, I could have never imagined my life like this, but I wouldn’t change it for the world, Please reach out if you need a friend
Momma
You say you love me
but how should I know
All your lies flood my mind
Who knows anymore
You said you’d be there
When I’m in need
But your not here momma
You could care less
But momma I need you
Yeah momma I need you
Momma you’ve changed
Since that cold dark day
Life will never be the same
It’s all gone now
Momma I need you
Momma I need you
We never talk
We never walk
We never see each other
It hurts momma
But momma I still need you
Yea momma I need you
You say that it’s not true
But you know it is momma
Your […]
Well today i got diagnosed with ptsd on top of my depression and anxiety.
This week has been really hard. I honestly just want to give up. My parents kicked me out today because im to “crazy” for them to handle. Which i guess i really am. Now i don’t know what to do there is no shelter any where around me and its winter. I just want this week to be over.
i saw you standing there alone upon the roof
your eyes puffy red and your lips were turning blue
tell me now
whats your reason darling tell me now
and dreams are made of wonder
and the curiosity
but if you do this now im telling you its not meant to be
so dont be sad there is now reason darling dont be sad
do follow the yellow brick road
talk to the stars in the sky it wont be easy i know there is no reason to cry
keep on moving keep the blood pumping keep your heart beating keep the smile
keep on […]
I’m about to give up. I don’t understand why this world hates me so much. Nothing I do is right. Nothing I do is good enough. I do everything for everyone and what I get in return is abuse and lies and manipulation. I cry myself to sleep every night. If I make the smallest mistake I get my food taken away for a whole week. I honestly don’t see why I even bother because no one wants me on this Earth so I might as well go someplace happy. Not like anyone would care anyways.
Her Blade
(Chorus)
Nobody sees behind her happy eyes
Nobody cares when she cries
Every night she gets out her blade
And she cries
Everyone says that that they care
But she doesn’t listen
Her voice tells her to not believe
To protect herself
(Chorus)
Nobody sees behind her happy eyes
Nobody cares when she cries
Every night she gets out her blade
And she cries
She says that she tries
But everyone knows that’s not true
She really doesn’t care anymore
She will be missed
Her mom walks in
To see her on the floor
With letters everywhere
And she cries
(Chorus)
Nobody saw […]
Honestly, I’m so beyond done even trying. Im so glad my parents arent back home until friday because i wouldnt want them to hear my last moments. I dont care anymore everything is over and ive had enough i guess this is my last goodbye
I cut myself everyday its the only way i feel relieved. Its been six years now and still no one even notices
Last summer i was forced to move out of my dads house because he wasn’t a good man. I was forced to move into my moms in a different state. I bearly even knew her. It was the first day of school and i could tell the students and teachers hated me all ready it was a rich kid school and i was no where near rich. The kids would point at me and laugh and whisper. I felt so small. About a month into school i found a “friend”. I was so happy to find someone i thought i could trust. We had hung […]