I have decided I am not going to live into next year. I am going to pay off debts and say my goodbyes and end it before 12/31/2015 11:59 pm. No one shall change my mind.
Nikolas Moralez
Nikolas Moralez
I am 19 and in college, I am 5'4" I hear voices non stop i wish for all this to end so i can be at peace.
I feel numb just all over me… I hate it i hate it all. I lost all will to fight and live in this life anymore. She seen me ball my eyes out and beg for her not to go… But she left, I feel all alone now all i want to do is just disappear. Can i do the, am i aloud to do that, will i do that? Yes i might. after i get my car here putt my 2 weeks in and disappear never come back never be seen again. leave my cell phone and laptop here with a letter saying goodbye…
I think it might be time to just end it all… I am giving up i lost all i wanted goodbye everyone maybe i will at least be able to watch over her and keep her safe when i am no longer here.
Fighting is human nature, and pretty much nature itself,
We fight everyday to live the life we live,
We fight wars,
Diseases,
Animals,
Ourselves,
We fight for love
Attention,
For Pride,
Greed,
We just fight,
We innovate ways to fight using tricks and disguises,
We use tactics,
And technology,
But i am fighting not a war i am fighting a battle,
I am fighting a battle in my mind for love and selfishness,
I am fighting to fixing my past mistakes,
I am going to fight till my last breath is drawn,
I will fight till my muscles deteriorate into dust,
I will fight till […]
I just push people away, I hate being close to them for so long cause I know i will lose them one way or another. I just want to be left alone I don’t want to be loved or liked at all. I only hurt them or they hurt me and or both. I am tired of all the circles I go into i am done. I am sitting here crying in my room hating it all. Just let me die everyone please just let me die, lay myself to rest and let this soul out of it human chains and be free. please just […]
Sadness is all I can feel
The more I try to find happiness and the light of it the more I feel I am losing it
Even when I stand I fell the darkness closing in around and blocking me
I try to run but it only catches up the sadness, the demons
I hide and they find me and surround me
They never try to capture me or hold me long
It is like they are playing a game with me slowly killing me
I am still living after that day, The day the screaming was loudest that day where the voices won that day. Ever since then I have been numb no feelings, no emotions, just nothing. I have seen a friend get hurt one I like a lot and I can’t help, I told her my feelings and she still does this around me. When she does I leave my apt and ask nothing of them I just leave crying in my mind cause tears can’t fall from my eyes cause my body is tired of it, I am numb cause of it. I told her that she […]
I am here in my apt surrounded by my friends and girlfriend, you think I would be happy as well as I; but I am not I want to die I feel sad and depressed all I want is to end it all and have no one realize and worry. I am not meant for living and happiness.
Hey I am new to this and I thank you for allowing me to post my feelings. I want to die I feel alone and worthless, but here is the thing I have friends who say they care and family who are there, but so are they the voices, the screams, the confusion, the more they talk the more I become sad and the faster I lose track and fall into depression and once I am there in the hole they scream. They scream saying I am worthless I should die I have never been loved. I want to die cause they never stop and […]