I don’t care anymore

I just push people away, I hate being close to them for so long cause I know i will lose them one way or another. I just want to be left alone I don’t want to be loved or liked at all. I only hurt them or they hurt me and or both. I am tired of all the circles I go into i am done. I am sitting here crying in my room hating it all. Just let me die everyone please just let me die, lay myself to rest and let this soul out of it human chains and be free. please just everyone hate me so I know no one would come and cry at my funeral. I don’t want a pastor or any father or priest. i just want to buried and forgotten. That is all I want and nothing more.