i have lost for people that i was close to this year and i am about to add another one to the list in six months or less. plus my dad almost died this year. why me. why dose death surround me.
I heard it again today.
He has cancer.
He has six months to live.
XFirst was my dad when he was one years old my dad is not suppose to be alive according to all doctors. second was my grandmas two dogs died of cancer. third was my grandma had skin cancer. then my mom told us on vacation she might have it thank god she was in the clear.then i didnt he the word tell 3 months later when my like granpa close friend died of brain ccancer. today. A close guy in my life has six months to live he is dying of […]
today my own mother informs me she is going to chicago the first week of my junior year wont even be here for support. then the next week her and my dad are leaving to go on vacation with my brother i hate being the background of the happy family just an acessory.
I remember how i wass told.
Grandpa was on the phone someone else then he said it you died.
I see you in the store.
I see you in the kitchen at the club.
you were like my grandpa.
i see you in my memories.
missing you.
they tell me they are proud but yet they tell me i am the reason they never had anymore kids. they tell me i dont have good enough grades that i need a scholaarship but yet they offer to pay the precious chosen first child they will help pay for his. when he moved out they gave him every family heirloome am i a daughter or a slave. i dont want to be an acessory. i see the fake love in their eyes. they take him everywhere i have been on one vacation i can remember with them th other were with my grandma. my […]
when i am in a room with blaring noises more then one i start to shake and my mind runs. i cant handle it when i am home that night i will lock my house up like no one will ever leave again and no one can ever enter. i hate it i want it to dissapear.
when i walk down the hallway i see how you judge how you laugh at my friends. i look you straight in the eye and i see that judgement you have never talked to me once in my lifetime but yet you can judge me. i am not proud of my self you dont need to put me down for my size or for what i wear or for my friends. let me live my life without your judgement.
In my life i use to be the perfect little girl. i played softball, dance, cheerleading, even played soccer. and was barely ever bullied i wanted that to be my life then i moved. ever since i moved i am not who i want to be i gained weight lost alot of friends and was bullied non stop. life for me is a struggle i struggle to keep friends i struggle to loose weight. i am not who i want to be….
today she told him. that she was and is in ove with him. she knows that he is with one of her old friends. but yet he says he loves her. she asks what he wants to do what he will do. he says ignore it. she dosnt want that. but she dosnt want to loose her best friend. but his next words killed her. he said we could be friends with benifits. she answers no. no words are exchanged for weeks she lost him. what to do? help
Its that girl who dated that guy who threatened to kill us at school. That girl lives a quite life dosnt have many friends. She dosnt trust that many people after that guy. her life is miserable his dad works at her school he reminds her of the pain she went through of the three years of love ruined by that guy. i am that girl.