i feel like i am going to burst into tears any minute and i feel that i’m never going to be able to stop. i have been so on edge today… i almost had a panic attack at school today…
i hate it when someone tries to take advantage of me… trying to get me to do things i can’t and don’t want to do… i’m so tired of it… it makes me feel worthless and unwanted… this time was so much worse… i can’t believe i trusted him…
i feel like i’m slowly dying inside…. each and everyday another piece is gone… soon there won’t be anything left
i feel like i’m falling apart… my whole world is crashing down around me.
why must i always do stupid stuff… i seem to not have a conscience…..i wonder why i do it…
i hate it when i can’t sleep because i can’t stop thinking of the things i try to avoid every waking hour of the day… i hide from it and then at night i get attacked by all my pain and sadness…
i am so mad at my mom… she knows that i have depression and that i can’t stand it and yet she won’t let me take medicine for it… even my therapist said that it would be a good idea…. i guess i’ll suffer until i’m in control of my medical things.
I hate everything… i am not joking i hate the way i feel… i hate the way i think and what others think and say about me… most of all i hate my life… every part of it.
i hate how i get mad at the littlest things… someone can look at me wrong and i’m so mad that i’m ready to knock their heads off.
I have lost so much in my lifetime… sometimes it seems crazy how much one person can lose. i have lost the small relationships i had with my dad and my sister who i haven’t talked to in three years. i have lost a mother that can do everything i need her to do for me… she can only do so much now. i have lost my happiness and motivation. i have lost friends and so many other people i have cared about. i lost my trust and care about my physical well being. i have lost my will to eat… but most of all […]
For the past ten years i have been struggling with depression. i don’t know when the suicidal thoughts began… i felt so alone like no one could understand what i felt the way i felt it. i could not tell anyone how i felt up until two or three years ago. and even then, nothing changed for the better for me. i always wanted everything bad to stop. all the yelling, all the drinking and drugs… everything gone. i hated the way that everyone seemed oblivious to the pain i felt and it seemed like they didn’t care enough about me to even stop and […]
I hate making decisions. And i have to decide on something really soon that can help me or might cause more damage than whats already done… i feel like no matter what decision i make someone will be over my shoulder… judging my decision.
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