It’s now been eight months since I was involuntarily committed for five days. I still have not gone one single day without reliving the awful feelings I felt at having all control over my life taken away by the hospital. From the moment the psych ER doctor laid down his judgement against me I’ve felt like I’ve been living in a nightmare instead of the real world. The immediacy of the terror and shock have faded but in the back of my mind there is still a constant sense of crisis. I feel like my life is divided into two distinct parts: before involuntary commitment […]
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live free or die
I was involuntarily committed to a psych ward about 6 months ago. I feel tremendous anger, humiliation and shame that this happened to me. So far I’ve made three serious suicide attempts while reliving the feelings from that experience. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by terror that I could lose my freedom again. When I was first released from the hospital, I didn’t feel safe in my own home. I try to avoid going to the part of town where the hospital is located. I left the country for three months and the main motivation I had for returning was to be able to commit suicide […]