lonelywanderer

I am going to assume that the majority of people on here are younger. Probably in their teens ans twenty’s. I find it sad that so many young people are so lonely and possibly suicidal.

I am middle aged and due to a series of unfortunate events and genetics, I have been alienated from society, confined to dealing with the demons in my head due to my mental illness. I was able to cope through medication, the benefit of being younger and having friends and the ability to work. All of this has been stripped away. It’s hard to make friends and share a history of […]

I usually don’t post much detail but it has gotten to the point of where I have to make a decision.DOCTORS don’t understand,they just want to medicate me hospitalize me (been in plenty) I have attended group therapy programs, which are useless to me. I am actually in one now but that was so my doctor didn’t try to petition me. I have done individual therapy which makes me feel even even worse afterwards.  I have been on hundreds of medications and they don’t work. I even tried ECT. It didn’t work and I ended up in a hospital right after my sessions. These have […]

So why am I so scared? To live is to die, we are all dying. But I have come to hate my life through anxiety and depression and they both make me feel like I am dying every second I am awake. But to force death before I reach my threshold must be more frightening than living or I would have found a way to overcome my survival instinct by now, right? I don’t know. I think a jump off a high place head first onto rocks or concrete might be a ten second hell at that, so why do I choose to suffer? I […]