If I was to cut myself up and die that would be suicide… Yes.. Hanging.. Yes.. Suffocating myself.. Yes.. But what if I stopped taking my asthma and blood pressure meds?.. Would that be a careless accident or would I be tarnished with the suicide brush?..
It’s been a hard day.. Â Trying to mediate between loved ones that are fighting.. Dragging me through their arguments, trying to get me to support them when all I want to do is hide in my cupboard and cry.. I’ve just taken 10 of my seroquels.. Hopefully I’ll be able to sleep soon.. I don’t understand how no one can see the false smile I wear day in, day out.. I’m sat staring at my knife.. I’ve had it for years and it always brings me comfort but then I know that I have lost the fight.. I think the longer I put it off […]
Everyone always comments on how confident and strong I am… Every time I smile back at them in response I’m only ever thinking one thing.. I wish I felt it..
I didn’t have a great childhood, a lot of people believe that is why I am the way I am.. Looking at the past has never made me feel low though because I got through it.. It’s the future that scares me, how in one second everything can change.. How the people closest to you can turn against you, hurt you.. Â How you can hurt people unintentionally yet it turns your entire world upside down.. Fear […]