I’m probably being stupid, I keep thinking that the only reason that I should continue living is so that my family don’t end up hurt but I’m starting to question my theory. I found my release a week or so ago, cutting, it helped me a bit. Whenever I got shouted at for poor conduct at school or something, I’d concentrate on the pain and everything else would just go silent no matter HOW hard they scream at me, I just wouldn’t hear it. It’s become a routine, planning out and researching how to end my pathetic existence that can’t even affect society, if I […]
Author
Nicole
Nicole
I'm 13, yes I know, I'm 13, 13!!! But I already know the path my life will take, I'll continue suffering in a prestigious school, I worked my ass off since I could write, my parents planned it since I was born and I followed their every order until I got here, one of the best schools in the country. what? Now I'm going to work hard to get into a good university? I'm supposed to get some job in medicine? Get married to a good man? Have kids? Die. Well, when you've lost interest in EVERYTHING, all the old things you used to enjoy, art, sport, music, you have to smile at everybody even if it's only a facade, spend my life behind close doors peeking at those who don't have to study all day and night for a career that they were pressured and molded to get and suicide is the only thing that you can't stop imagining, everything shard of glass a weapon, every train could be my release, every banister, every lake.... I've planned it out, I'll carry on to preserve that smile on my loving parent's face, whenever I falter, their joy cracks which leads my heart to ache, before the age of 30, when I'm forgotten, I'll do the deed. Eternal youth.