I have decided to end it all. Almost a year and a half ago my youngest son cut me out of his life because his girlfriend didnt like the choices I made about my business. They wont talk to me nor will they allow me to see my grandchildren. They have always been close to me til now. They have lived next door to us for over 5 years until this conflict. My grandson is only 7 so untill the estrangement he always was next door. I now have a grand daughter that I dont even know or would even recongnize if I did see her. she is 1 1/2. Now my son is getting married this summer to the girlfriend that hate me so much. My oldest son loves me but keeps his distanceÂ becauseÂ of the conflict.Â Three months ago I lost my business. I am in bankruptsy. I am being audited as well. My oldest son sees me only a occationally. He hates coming around because I am so distraught over my youngest son. I dont know how to pick up and move on. I am nothing but a disappointment to everyone. I feel like everyone will be better off without me. Here is my issue. I AM GOING TO DIE VERY SOON. How do I do this without devistating my oldestÂ son. He is not close to his dad so how do I do this and know that he is going to be okay. That he and his brother willÂ be okay.