well last night i lost it and dumped the rest of my pills down my throat…i wish i were like the restof youwhere i could drone on and make some huge intresting explaination about what happened but i cant…i feel like a real ass not expressing my issues because now you guys think i make them up right? Well here goesmy explaination:you dont know how it feels to wake up everyday and be drowned wit annoying bothersome voices and demons who leap onto you and rip your soul out! You dont know how it feels to always long for suicide, to always look down at […]
the new skate ban in my town is killing all the skaters…it sucks…no more friday night skating…we arent gonna walk over to the next town to skateboard in their shitty ass skate park…as anupdate onmy inactivity: im tired of this site…it dosent help and my parents are gonna find out soon…
Yep…THAT bored…
Yeah…i came home from his party (huuuge binge btw) and when i got this random “hold up im just gonna hang myself right quick” feeling so i was sitting on the livingroom floor making a noose when my mom comes downstsirs to the soud of my creepyass laughing and slapped me then she dragged me ouf to the car and drove me to the teens mmental help hospital where i sat in therapy for a week then recovery till friday, came home, packed my stuff for xacation , got my ipod touch and then we left for wild wood… And now im back…hey…
whats the use if you cant even cry on their shoulder…
anyways, my demons are getting overwhelming and im waiting to just stop cutting like a ***** and TERRORIZE my fucking wrist…
ryans party. best night ever. still a few hours to go, using itouch to post…ily ryan ～<3
～*my legs are dangling off the edge, the bottom of the bottle is my only friend, i think i’ll slit my wrists again and im gone, gone, gone, gone*～
im frikkin deaf from blasting suicide silence, asking alexandria, my children my bride, lamb of god, and cannible corpse…-brain explosion- whoa.
uh…just staring at this cut on my wrist…kinda depressed…=～= ill get over it….
(warning, may be a little too real for some)
7 years ago
you were taken away, i was scrreaming, crying…
5 years ago
my first visit to you, i had to be pulled out and taken to a mental hospital. at 8 years old.
2 years ago
i went to visit again…you saw my cuts, and silently cried. i walked out.
1 year ago
i wrote a letter to you…the gaurds dident give it to you.
3 months ago
i promised to write you.
1 month ago
i joined sp, giving up all hope.
10 minutes ago
i stARted writing this.
now
i hope to end it. now.
*goodnight*
i cant do it
i cant love you
i cant…
i cant….
you always said i CAN.
i COULD.
but i couldent.
i never could.
you were dragged to prison.
two years later jail.
because of her.
she LIED!
how could you have loved her?!
i visit you all the time
i have nothing to say.
if i said whats really “up”,
it would be this:
hey uncle tom! yeah i have been cutting myself, making nooses, trying to drown and suffocate myself, posting things on a website called fucking suicide project, and whining about my depression! hows your time going?
but i cant.
it has been SEVEN YEARS!!!!
I miss you, is all i can say.
would anyone like to see what my art looks like..? i cant really draw people but i like to draw wolves and foxes, sometimes cats. it will be digital cause i dont have a scanner -sad- im in a suprisingly good mood today….heh
Ten years ago
We were both fifteen. Teenagers. Too old to be called children, and barely old enough to be called teens. Too old to be taken care of, but too young to get many freedoms. Lost, reckless and confused, much like the majority of our age group. Except for one tiny difference: we were being held in a school for emotionally unstable teens.
Neither of us thought there was anything wrong with ourselves, but apparently the rest of the world disagreed. We were both there for the same reason, which was cutting and repeated suicide attempts. Nothing some special school could fix; just a bit of […]
“The Suburbs”
In the suburbs I
I learned to drive
And you told me we’d never survive
Grab your mother’s keys we’re leavin’
You always seemed so sure
That one day we’d be fighting
In a suburban war
Your part of town against mine
I saw you standing on the opposite shore
But by the time the first bombs fell
We were already bored
We were already, already bored
Sometimes I can’t believe it
I’m movin’ past the feeling
Sometimes I can’t believe it
I’m movin’ past the feeling again
Kids wanna be so hard
But in my dreams we’re still screamin’ and runnin’ through the yard
And all of […]
i tried drowning myself so many times today…i have a party at huricane harbor tomorrow so i wont be on till late…ITS HOT AS BALLS IN HERE OHMYGOD. it feels like satin pissed lava on my shoulders uuuuuhg….bye, goodnight nathen <3
the little bitchass demons that come along with my voices keep staring at me with that •-• face and give me teeth grinding, fist clenching, head pounding, random pains…its hard to explain…it hurts…and im tired…and pain is one of the most misused words on this site…jus sayin…
he always keeps me up waiting, says he`ll text me, but hhe never does…it feels like someone took my heart and shredded it…he always says he loves me on fb…but never in person…he dosent love me…he never wil…
～♪
slow as fuck browser…meeh well my voices wont shut the…..-sigh- so bored…nobodys answering me and im so messed up today…im in need of help but i dont want to bring anything up to my parents…ill probs just cut and cry over it like always…
-99%～♪±
i cut really deep annd am now suffering from blood loss…i wish i were in washington not new jersey…theres not many cutters in nj…e-e i dont feel like doing anythig…have i introdused myself properly yet? nope! well here goes:
hi, im lexi, im 13 and as i have covered, i have horrible mental health. i have tried almost everything but im a cowered and cant finish myself off…i cut, burn, scratch, re-open, and all those other self-harm things…i dont stop because it feets good, and i like it. its hard to go a few days without selh harming…i ofteen have suicdal dreams. my voices made […]
dont know why…i..i just want the voices to stop…heroin…ya know i have it…im just too much of a sissy to try…i did weed last week though and for a while…i acctually felt happy…cant post anything from my dsi(yeah i know babyish but i use it for animation help and internet, getting an itouch soon) cause its an old version of opera….just really pissy and i feel like vying…bipolar….the fmes are getting to me…hah….i guess ill listen to more asking alexandria and keep threatining my “friends” that im gonna kill myself…but they all know i never will….but the day i do theyre gonna be suprised i […]
well…finally got this thing running…im schizojinxx, but please, call me lexi. im schizophrenic, emo, bipolar, depressed and psychotic at times. i have very few, but VERY nice friends. i enjoy drawing, but i SUCK at drawing people…i cut, often. but i am going to try burning. i atempt suicide often…VERY often but im scared of how my friends would get on. fu(k my family, they dont care. i curse alot so yeah..thats me for ya…i hope to find someone like me on here…
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