I often think about finally ending it all…the only thing that’s keeping me from doing it is my family. I feel numb. I can’t express my feelings. I love this boy but I can’t tell him…I don’t know if it’s because I’m embarrassed to be seen with him because he’s not apart of “my crowd” or if I’m just too scared to try because I care about him so much…maybe it’s both. I just think that it’s impossible for me to achieve the success and happiness and love that I long for….so what’s the point in trying, right?