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masters of the dark

by kateralia 8/24/2014

written by kateralia

It is amazing that the ones who need the most help are the ones who are overlooked or ignored. We are the ones who have mastered the art of lying, stealing, cheating and faking. These arts are not used to rise above our position in society, but they are used just to survive on this earth.

Its funny how those who are ‘successful’ are always caught lying, cheating and stealing. I suppose one could say that if you really wanted to be successful, you should learn those arts from us. But then, that would mean someone would have to pay attention to us. They would have […]

8/24/2014 5 comments

Careless

by Scarlett Dawn 8/24/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

I hate the stench of stale tobacco on my clothes. I hate the sensation of being far from reality when the drugs attack my body and mind. I hate the lack of sensibility when the devils nectar poisons my brain. I hate stealing from the oblivious shopkeepers. I hate driving when intoxicated and drugged, smiling at the police officers that watch me beaming- as though they gather I have nothing to hide behind my misleading smile. I hate when the doctors tell me I am doing fine.

I’ve long perfected the ability to play the game right and pretend that I am same.

As I drive down the […]

8/24/2014 12 comments

It just seems inevitable.

by Jawbreaker84 8/24/2014

written by Jawbreaker84

I’ve struggled my whole life with depression and for a very very long time I’ve been convinced that suicide is by far the most likely way that I will die. I just can’t take it anymore. I’ve done everything right. I’m doing the drug/therapy thing, I quit drinking, and I exercise regularly. Unfortunately none of these can stop the heart crushing loneliness that I feel so often. I hate my job, I’m broke, and I have no real friends around here, but those aren’t the main reasons I think I’m going to kill myself soon. Ever since getting treatment for depression I’d have short periods […]

8/24/2014 4 comments

. . .

by StruggleOn 8/23/2014

written by StruggleOn

I need a break from this loneliness that is consuming me so quickly…

8/23/2014 8 comments

The reason I’m ready to leave this world behind

by Infectious208 8/23/2014

written by Infectious208

My newest and probably last song. I havent been on for a bit. I have really been trying to feel better. But I cant. She is the most beautiful woman in the world and the 2 of them were my everything. I dont want to do this without them. I cant keep going on faking that im ok. Im not. Soon, I will be gone and I wont be a burden or bother to anyone anymore.

I hope one day she sees this and will know how much they ment to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-vGzh3tj1Y

8/23/2014 2 comments

I can’t wait to die!

by cookietherookie 8/23/2014

written by cookietherookie

I can’t wait until the day i return to nonexistence. I hate the world, I hate what humans have done to the world. They destroyed it like they do everything else. I look at just about everyone with disdain. I have nothing to live for, no kids, pets, hopes or dreams. I care about my family, but not enough to tolerate this world for them.

The only thing really stopping me is my fear or failing and ending up as a vegetable or paralyzed from the neck down. I’m trying to convince my mother to buy a shotgun so I can eradicate the possibility or either […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

Fuck this world.

by taipan67 8/23/2014

written by taipan67

No words can ever express THE FULL EXTENT of how fed up and done with this steaming pile of dogshit we call human society, on this rock, in this universe with these laws of physics, as I am. I’ve surpassed the thin boundaries of apathetic, I am a void with human form. The unbelievably idiotic things I hear people say and think on a regular basis make me want to use a metal baseball bat to smash their heads in. The gene pool is polluted by people who should’ve been strangled several times over already. Fuck they’re dumb as rocks.

Maintain, maintain, maintain, maintain, and maintain. […]

8/23/2014 17 comments

Look What I’ve Become

by smith90 8/23/2014

written by smith90

I’m scared. I’m scared of myself. I’m scared that I won’t, can’t feel. See, since the day I was born I have had this steadily growing indifference to life. For the past year I’ve been getting this feeling that everything is meaningless, pointless and that terrifies me. I just want to know that if someone I love dies I can feel the pain in losing them, actually be able to cry, somehow force myself to care. I don’t know how I move day to day with this feeling so ingrained in my soul that at some point I’ll feel nothing, not even the fear of […]

8/23/2014 4 comments

Pill Bottles lined up. Numbness taking over

by CMZ 8/23/2014

written by CMZ

I don’t really know why I am posting here or why it is that I am sharing this with strangers.

I think all the things happening in my life right now that have driven me over the edge are irrelevant.

The anxiety and pain are almost gone and I feel completely numb.

I thought about Suicide before, many times. And every time I got very close.

Right now I am as close to finalizing it as never before, being alone in a hotel room, away from my loved ones, with 7 bottles of prescription pills lined up in the side table.

And the silly thing is, all I can think […]

8/23/2014 3 comments

this is the end

by why i dont no 8/23/2014

written by why i dont no

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSUIQgEVDM4

8/23/2014 0 comment

Unimportant

by AJokeOfFate 8/23/2014

written by AJokeOfFate

Caring isn’t an option for me, as much as I hate to say it. I can’t just look at someone and ignore their pain. Yes, I may be blind to it at first but as it becomes apparent to me, I feel it as my own. And that’s the one thing I truly hate myself for. Because I’m incapable to hold a grudge or to sabotage someone because of something they did to me. Forgiveness comes easy- almost too easy at times.
I wish I could distance myself from people like people have done to me. Honestly, it would be so much easier and my […]

8/23/2014 2 comments

shouldnt I just kill myself

by DeadGirlNotFound 8/23/2014

written by DeadGirlNotFound

My life is perfect today.This depression is deafening. I cant see a thing. My vision is blurred. All I can dream of is death, I just in no way can tolerate one more day, I willingly want to die but I feel im being selfish. Im so much hurt that death looks beautiful. I need the stable peace, I have tried twice this time im jumping off a high building if I can have access to one. Im yet to complete my suicide note. I dont want to hurt my family, but I know im doing it very soon.. everything in my life is in […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

I think I’AM a loser after all

by Vader 8/23/2014

written by Vader

Since 2002, I have been making the same mistake again and again. What is permanent is the despair and the gradual loss of confidence till the point that I’m scared of interacting with my boss and colleagues fearing I’m wrong and stupid and can’t do much.

It all started with a marriage which lasted for 3 months. We got married after going around for almost 5 years. and the reason given was as stupid as-” You don’t earn enuf and can’t and will not be able to take care of me”. Of course I was not earning well that time, much lesser than my partner, I […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

My life ; update

by lostsoulblanklife 8/23/2014

written by lostsoulblanklife

I’ve been more depressed these days, listening to sad songs such as;

Youth – Daughter

Who you are – Jessie J

To build a Home – The Cinematic Orchestra

Before You Start Your Day – Twenty One Pilots

Those songs really get to me. They have a huge background, because I used to listen to them two or three years ago when my life was really going downhill.

I’ve met some friends online, but two of them lied to me. But not just a little white lie.. It was like huge ones for both of them.

One of them – Named Lauren – She lied about getting raped, getting pregnant, then being stabbed.. […]

8/23/2014 3 comments

aeterna

by yagharek 8/23/2014

written by yagharek

Still miss you.

8/23/2014 5 comments

Away…

by coconut-scent 8/23/2014

written by coconut-scent

The past few months have been really hard, with the experiences of my past and the relationships I have with my family now, I feel like I can’t go on with all of this rubbish.

I see a therapist to help me try to get back on track with my life and I take anti-depressants, but I feel like my reactions and emotions with what has happened is permanently seared into my heart and soul. Whenever I wake up and I get that painful stab in my chest, you the feeling of your heart literally breaking. I cry almost everyday, longest I have gone without crying […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

I love helping

by Dolunay 8/23/2014

written by Dolunay

Hi everybody, my name is Dolunay 34y male.

I found myself in this website by chance, I’m not suicidal at all but it shocked me to see all these confused spirits, & it saddens me to see they have reached to this blocked way.

I love offering my help by listening (at least) & I promise to not misjudge or misunderstand, & I’d love to read from anybody. don’t hesitate to send to my email, I’ll reply gladly;

goods_maker@yahoo.com

love you all, have a nice day.

8/23/2014 0 comment

When will I learn??

by alina_01 8/23/2014

written by alina_01

To let go of all the bad shit in my life, or anything for that matter? Because I can never seem to let go of anything in life and I have no clue why. I had crappy friends that I stopped being friends with and yet they are still in my life I still give them opportunities, like wtf? But last night I realized this isn’t the life I want for myself. I want to be happy have good friends I want to be in love and be with someone who loves me. But I ruin that for myself I met this cool guy and […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

anyone from OZ?

by kateralia 8/23/2014

written by kateralia

Is anyone on here from Australia? Or is it just me? I feel so disconnected. Everything I find is in America…

I decided to colour my hair the other day, to try to get me out of this funk I’m in. It’s worked before. I’m naturally blonde, so you can imagine all the jokes I copped at school. I usually dye my hair black. It’s longer now, since I can’t afford a haircut, so it’s growing out. So I bleached it…

You can imagine the outcome… yellow ends, orange middle & white roots. My best friend (whom i live with) stared at me in horror & […]

8/23/2014 57 comments

a rare good day

by heliumhood 8/23/2014

written by heliumhood

2day is a good day. My beloved and I have been celebrating his father’s birthday with our best friend KK. sometimes the very thing that u need is right in front of you .

8/23/2014 1 comment

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