It wasnt always like this…. Growing up I thought I had the world, I had parents that loved me and loved each other… I had friends that no matter what where always their for me. Growing up I was always shy, and had low self esteem. But it didn’t get to me until I was 15. My mom cheated on my dad, she now has a new boyfriend who is mean. I lost all my friends, I pushed them away. I became depressed, suicidal, cutting myself, getting high, drinking, I wanted to die. I hated myself. I planned to do it multiple times, but every […]
Last year on December 9th I lost my virginty, to a guy I thought really liked me. We where talking over the summer and he was always busy. After many tries we finally saw each other. The place where we going to go was closed so he said lets just go to the park. He asked if I had any smokes, I told him no. So we went across the street and he made me pay for the cigs. As we got to the park […]
how the heck does one change their profile picture? I’ve seen people with pics but can’t seem to figure it out!
People will work for nothing as long as you give them the illusion of something.
“Iron”
The earth, the rain, and the thunder in the music has stopped
Switched to the sound of a ghosted, a being of aghast
I have three-minute in abyss to sing my way through
Real-truth reality chained to a bell and cast in the maze
Pure-plague of Gaia, 2014 A.D.
Escapade the atomic, the tectonic, inside the belly
The bells of continuation will never stop ringing now
Of my white-dog of all foremost, take him, take me, take you
Alpha Black-Lotus
In the labyrinth, an only way to come through behind gateway-thirteen
Is to call for an angel, winged-creature of heart and your holy bone
Cubone cannot […]
So I came across this site randomly whilst looking for ways to overcome anxiety and how to stop being a failure.
I had an amazing job, I screwed it up with my depression. I lost a baby back in 2011, a baby that was wanted so much. I had suffered with depression years before that but the minute I found out i was going to be a mum it was like my life was perfect and all the grey clouds had lifted. But there was a problem with the pregnancy and I had to terminate on medical grounds at 20 weeks. She wouldn’t survive, her lungs […]
I have often wondered why I wanted to just end it. And I usually end up with the fact that I am lost and my life has no direction. But now, I realized, there’s something more than that.
I realized that I am the complete opposite of myself before (when I was driven, confident, ambitious). Now I am very insecure, confused and just flat-out tired and unmotivated. What makes me want to end it is I could have AVOIDED IT. I USED to be on the other side, the side of optimism, of hope in the future. When I started college, I was among intelligent people, […]
Ever since I was a little girl I dreamt of death. Specifically in the forms of vampires. I was obsessed with the thought of rebirth after death. Of becoming this new, more powerful, and less vulnerable creature simply by dying and leaving your previous life behind. I guess that’s where it started..
I’ve never been able to release this obsession with death. Recently I’ve been making things more dangerous by mixing and overusing medications plus alcohol. I don’t know if I really want to die, or if I just want the rebirth. Rebirth into the life where I’m invincible.
The saddest part of all of this […]
Does anyone want to talk?
…Does anyone want to listen?
My iPhone’s network-mainframe seems to be operating back to normal. I wonder.. I probably shouldn’t network back on that laptop, though.
I feel so low, I have to be around others to earn enough to keep going, I try to hide away so they won’t notice me and won’t talk about me behind my back, even if they do, I don’t want to hear it. I know I have a problem which causes them to do so, if it wasn’t for that I might just be okay. How do normal people cope with it all, laughing and joking and having a good time; hey, I joke, but inside I feel like crap all the time. Life once promised me so much, now I struggle to see […]
The reason that I hated the medication was not only because it made what little wits I had disappear….it was because of the false “happiness” that it seemed to give me. Not even happiness…all it did was tarnish the true feelings of sadness, invalidated it by erasing the memories of what caused my pain. So I was left with the sadness, the depression, but a feeling that I was inflicting it upon myself, making me feel even more worthless. As if this pain was…made up. All in my head. I want to run away into space and never come back. I want to disappear. So […]
I don’t know how much longer i can keep faking a smile. Whether it be at school, home, with friends and family I don’t think i can keep it up much longer. I might end up running away and never coming back..
I don’t know what to do. I bet nobody would care or notice if I left anyways
Why don’t I pack up and leave for good? :/ I am alone as it is anyways….
I’ve been wanting to kill myself ever since I was 10. That’s a little over three years now all that has changed is that I actually tried it four times so far.
So, I am a boy. I grew up with my mom who is really sentimental and everything so I feel like I got a lot of that emotional site. I am not strong and always felt like it separated me from the other boys. I always had more girl friends, but that’s mostly also because I am not really into soccer/football and all the boys always only wanted to play that on the school […]
Just one question for you all… Why is it that in sometimes I feel like I’m back in that exact moment when my life really changed? Why is it that I can hear and see everything like it’s right there infront of me? Why is it I can even see it in color vivid as can be? Why can I even smell that familiar sent?…. Whys it all seem so real? Real to the point where lately I’m questioning myself if it is or not.. Sigh
Giving up is a terrifying thought. Naturally, you don’t want to give in and give up. But, once you start giving up, it’s the most liberating feeling in the world.
I know I should fight, be determined but I’m tired. Tired of everyone and everything tearing me down, so why not give up? Whats the point anyhow? Life is a goddamn contradictory lie so, why try to live it?
Giving up is terrifying, I know I shouldn’t, but damn does it feel good.
I just don’t know anymore….
Am I the only one that doesn’t want to have to depend on medication to be the rest of my life? Because I went to the doctors the other day and he said that I’m going to have to be on medication all my life. And if I don’t take my low doses now then my suicidal thoughts will just get worse… I don’t want to have to depend on medication all my life… 🙁
Right in front of my mom. So suicidal. ‘It kills me”.
What a ghast.
She knew what I was doing..
I am here just to ask one simple thing for the ones who’ve tried it. Can we live (if not happily,somehow keep breathing without killing oneself ) all alone? I mean by isolating oneself from everyone we know. Is it worth living or breathing would just be a waste of time? Going to a far off distance,leaving everyone behind and off to such a place where nobody knows you. Just to earn your bread and somehow live.I am a girl from the eastern part of the world so my problem wouldn’t make sense to most of you. All my life people have compared me with […]
I think’ve never introduced myself before… i apologize if i acted a kind bitter before… i was just in the phase ” i’ve passed through worse things, what is this person complaing about?”… i’ve realized that this was of no help.
Well, i’m from brazil, i don’t speak English perfectly as most of you’ve noticed already, i like poetry, art and also I’m passionate with the nature. Im yrs old and also an actor.
I wanna die because live has been a ***** with me.. so many sad things. and also i feel no one cares to the pain that is in my heart, i’ve been abused countless […]